


The Exchange Student

by IvanW



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Teenagers, Angst, Boys Kissing, Child Abuse, Cuddling & Snuggling, Exchange Student, First Kiss, First Love, First Time, Gay, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, M/M, Romance, Soul Bond, Step-parents, Tarsus IV aftermath, Verbal Abuse, Vulcan, no sexual abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-11
Updated: 2016-09-18
Packaged: 2018-06-01 17:02:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 20,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6528499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IvanW/pseuds/IvanW
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Not long after teenaged Jim returns from Tarsus IV, his family takes in an exchange student from the planet Vulcan, Spock.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Welcome to Riverside

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文 available: [交换生](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8257813) by [lucy26](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lucy26/pseuds/lucy26)



Jim was dreaming his was on a ship in space. A freight ship. No. A starship. And he was Captain. Yes. He smiled. Then felt excruciating pain in his ear.

He yelped and sat up, chest heaving.

“What the fuck are you still doing in bed?” His stepfather, Frank, yelled. He stood over Jim’s bed, hands on hip, glaring. “Get your lazy ass up and get dressed.”

Jim rubbed his ear. “What for?”

“Because Dummy. That exchange student arrives on the shuttle in forty-five minutes.”

Jim grimaced and reached up to flatten down his hair. “Why do we have to have an exchange student anyway?”

“Because your mother said so. Wasn’t my idea. But if she wants that promotion, she had to agree. So you’re coming with me and putting on a happy, welcoming face for the freak.”

“What makes you think he’s a freak?”

“He’s one of them Vulcans. They’re all freaks. His daddy’s an ambassador so we gotta meet him all nice at the shuttle.” He pulled Jim out of the bed and shoved him toward his closet. “And listen here, boy, you better be as nice as can be to this freak while he’s here over the summer. Make a good impression so you’re mom gets a good report. I’ll beat the shit out of you if you don’t.”

“If it’s an exchange, how come I don’t get to go to Vulcan?”

Frank smirked. “Because no one wants you, Dummy. Be downstairs in five minutes or I’ll brain you.” Frank wrenched open his bedroom door and left.

Jim pulled out his underwear, jeans, and a long sleeved T-shirt, while he looked out the window to see what the weather would be. It was a little windy but no signs of clouds, so probably no rain. He dressed quickly, mindful of Frank’s threats, which he always carried through.

When he made it downstairs, Frank tossed him an apple.

“If I don’t give you something to eat you’ll whine to your mama I’m starving you.” Frank sneered. “All that ‘psychological trauma’.” He did the air-quotes. “You had it good there, staying with your crazy bitch aunt. You had to go and fuck it up.”

“I didn’t cause the crops to fail.” Jim had been sent to live on Tarsus IV with Frank’s sister, Tabitha, shortly after Sam had left and Jim sent Frank’s car sailing off a cliff. “She wasn’t my aunt either. She wasn’t crazy, just mean.”

“How do I know that? I forgot what an ungrateful shit you are. Tabitha treated you real nice. Anyway, you should have starved with the rest of them.”

“Maybe I should have,” Jim mumbled.

“What was that?” Frank asked, sharply.

“Nothing.”

“Yeah, you’re right, it’s nothing. Watch that smart mouth of yours, boy. It’s gonna get you in real trouble one day. Now get out to the truck.”

Jim walked to the back door and outside. “The truck? Why don’t we take one of the bigger cars? Or the hover?”

“Ain’t nothing wrong with the truck.” Frank spit as they made their way to the barn. “You can ride in the truck bed on the way back while he rides in the cab. Or you can both squeeze into the cab like a couple of fags. I don’t give a shit.”

“Where’s he sleeping?” Jim asked, getting into the passenger side of the truck.

“In your room.”

“My room? What’s wrong with Sam’s?”

“Your mama and I decided he’d room with you. He’s supposed to be experiencing Terran culture or whatever. Might as well be with you. Besides, maybe he’ll be a good influence on you and you’ll stop being such a shit.”

“Sam’s room is empty anyway,” Jim muttered.

“So? You do as you’re told, boy. I’m gonna turn Sam’s room into a—”

“Game room. You’ve been saying that since he left.”

“Don’t sass me. I’ll get around to it. Maybe I’ll make you and the freak help me do it over the summer. Now your mama’s coming home this afternoon, so you’d better behave both with us and the freak. I’ll beat the shit out of you if you don’t.”

Jim nodded. He still had a split lip and a sore side from the other day so he knew Frank was good on his word. He wrinkled his nose. “Truck stinks.”

“Burning oil or something. Maybe transmission. I’ll work on it later in the week. You can help me. You ain’t too pretty to get a little dirty.”

Frank drove the truck down the dirt road from the farmhouse and into the main part of Riverside.

“How long’s he staying?”

“Told you. The summer.”

“Kind of vague,” Jim said.

“He’s going back to Vulcan in September. After Labor Day, I think. Your mom knows.” Frank pulled into the parking lot of the shuttle and turned to look at Jim. “Listen here, boy. You keep your mouth shut about certain things. He don’t need to know family business. You got that?”

“I got that.” Jim knew he should keep his mouth shut, but he had to push. “How are you going to beat the shit out of me in front of him anyway? Won’t that spoil things?”

Frank narrowed his eyes at Jim. “I thought about that. I got two choices. Hit you where it won’t show and somewhere where he isn’t around. Or wait until he leaves in September and really make sure you remember how to behave properly. Maybe both. I guess we’ll see.”

Jim swallowed and opened the truck door to get out.

They walked up to the arriving shuttle and waited.

About ten minutes later, the shuttle door opened and passengers began to depart.

“Your mama’s coming on the afternoon shuttle,” Frank told Jim. “She’s gonna make a big dinner.”

“Vulcans are vegetarians,” Jim replied.

“I know that, Dummy.”

Jim watched as a teen Vulcan boy slightly older than himself walked down the ramp. He was dressed in brown trousers and a wheat-colored long sleeve sweater. He was actually quite good looking, Jim didn’t fail to notice, though he’d keep that opinion to himself, and far from Frank. As he stopped in front of him, Jim noticed he had beautiful brown eyes.

“Spock?” Frank asked, though since there were no other Vulcans around it had to be him.

“Affirmative. You are Mr. Thatcher?”

“That’s right. Frank Thatcher. This is my son, James.”

“Stepson.”

Frank narrowed his eyes at Jim. “ _Step_ son.”

“And it’s Jim. _Kirk_.” Jim held up his hand in the ta’al and saw Frank mimic him out of the corner of his eye. “Welcome to Riverside and our home, Spock.”

“Thank you, Jim,” Spock replied without inflection.

“Let’s get your luggage and we can be on our way to the farmhouse.” Frank smiled. And since most times Frank’s smile was little more than a sneer, it looked weird on his face. Like maybe Frank had been replaced by a pod person or something. Jim wished.

They went to collect Spock’s luggage with Frank ordering Jim to carry the two big cases. Spock attempted to take them.

“No, no. Let Jim do it. He can manage,” Frank assured Spock. “This way.”

Spock walked beside Frank toward the truck while Jim struggled with the large cases to follow. They were waiting at the truck by the time Jim made it. Once more Spock tried to take them.

“Jim,” Frank said pointedly. “Put those cases in the bed.”

Jim tried not to glare, knowing what he’d get in return, and with his thin arms aching from the effort, swung the first case into the bed of the truck. He turned to get the other one, but Spock stepped over and took it, swinging it inside the truck with ease. Jim lowered his gaze, not wanting to see what Spock thought of his weakness. Jim was still a little weak from his time on Tarsus IV. But Spock couldn’t know that. Frank did, though.

“Spock, you ride up in the cab with me. Jim can ride in the back.”

“I do not mind riding in the back,” Spock spoke up.

“Nonsense,” Frank said with a smile. “You’re our guest. Jim’s fine back there. Aren’t you, boy?”

“Yes, I’m fine.”

Jim crawled into the back of the truck and lifted the gate to close the back.

“This is an old Terran vehicle?” Spock asked as he closed the door to the passenger side. Jim didn’t hear Frank’s answer as he pulled out of the parking lot.


	2. Jim's Room

“Take Spock upstairs and show him where he’s staying,” Frank Thatcher barked at his young blond stepson as they entered the farmhouse. “I gotta go…do something in the barn.” The man grimaced and disappeared out a side door leaving Spock alone with the young boy named Jim Kirk.

Jim, for his part, licked his lips nervously as he gazed at Spock through very blue eyes. Spock had never seen their equal.

“He’s, uh, going out to smoke funny cigarettes,” Jim told him.

“Funny cigarettes?”

Jim nodded. “Weed.”

Spock inclined his head, not sure what Jim was talking about. He decided not to question it. Terrans were known for their peculiarities. He reached down to pick up his suitcases.

“I-I can get those,” Jim said.

“It is of no consequence,” Spock replied. “I am used to their weight.”

Jim bit his lip and nodded. “Okay. This way.”

He followed Jim up stairs that did not seem entirely stable. Spock remarked on that.

“Oh. Well. I think they’re okay. I mean, no one’s fallen through them yet.”

Spock was not comforted by that.

At the top of the hallway, Jim led him down to the last door on the right side. He twisted the handle and opened it, standing aside to allow Spock entry.

“This is my room. You-you’re staying with me.” Jim stepped inside as Spock set his cases down on the floor. Spock noted there was only one bed in the room. “Queen.”

Spock blinked.

Jim suddenly turned a dark shade of red. “The bed. It’s queen-sized. That’s-that’s what it’s called here. Um, I don’t know about on Vulcan. Anyway, it’s got plenty of room. We should be all right.”

Spock nodded. “I am sure it will be satisfactory.”

“You can put your suitcases in the closet or whatever. There are hangers for your clothes. I didn’t make any room in my dresser for you, you know, like underwear or small things you might have or whatever. But I can, if you’d like.”

“That would be agreeable, thank you.”

Out came Jim’s tongue again. “All right.” He moved toward the dresser. “Which side?”

“Side?”

“Of the bed. You know. What side do you like to sleep on?”

“I have no particular preference.”

“Good. I like the right side, closest to the window, then.” He worked at stuffing clothes from one drawer into another. “How many drawers did you want?”

“Just one will be sufficient.”

Jim nodded again and crammed more into a drawer he could barely get closed. “Here you go then.” He walked back toward the bed. “It’s not fancy or anything.”

“I do not require fancy.”

“’Kay. There’s a lock on the door, but I’m not supposed to lock it.”

“Vulcans value privacy.”

“Uh.”

Spock turned to fill the drawer he had been given with his underthings and socks. “I will ask to lock the door.”

“All right. Um, the bathroom's a couple of doors down the hall. It’s just us using that one. Mom and Frank have their own bathroom. Mom will be home later in the afternoon. She’s catching a shuttle from San Francisco.”

“I look forward to meeting her,” Spock replied, politely. He turned back to face Jim. “If it is all right with you, Jim, I would like to make contact with my parents and advise them that I have arrived safely.”

“Sure, go ahead.”

“I would like to do so privately, if I may,” Spock said gently.

“Oh. Duh.” Jim turned red again. “Sorry.”

“There is no requirement of an apology.”

Jim nodded, licked his lips. “Okay. See you.” Jim slipped out the door and closed it behind him.

Spock picked up his suitcase that held his PADD and laid it across the bed. He unzipped it and set it up on the nearby dresser so he could connect with them while he hung up his clothing.

His mother was smiling when her face appeared on Spock’s screen. “Oh, Spock! You arrived?”

“Yes, Mother. This is the room I have been given for my stay here in Riverside.”

“Oh, move the screen around for a moment so I can see the whole room.”

Spock did so, though he thought it was quite illogical. There was nothing particular about the room that would be of interest. He set it back down.

“It looks nice.”

“It belongs to Jim.”

“Jim?”

“Jim Kirk, my companion for the summer. You remember Winona Kirk-Thatcher has a son.”

Mother smiled wider. “Yes. Just a couple years younger than you. You’ve met him?”

“Yes.”

“And?”

Spock raised a brow. “And what?”

“What do you think of Jim?”

“I have not given him a great deal of thought, Mother. He seems of an amiable temperament.”

Mother laughed for some reason. “That’s good. Is he cute?”

“Cute?”

“Yeah, you know.”

“Wife.” Sarek, Spock’s father appeared on the screen. “Stop bothering Spock with such illogical and unimportant questions.” His mother pouted. “You are settled there?”

“Yes, Father.”

“Excellent. We expect periodic reports on your stay there.”

“Affirmative.”

“From what I researched Riverside is…uneventful.”

“Boring, you mean,” Mother said, with a laugh, and an affectionate smile in her husband’s direction.

“Perhaps,” Father allowed. “I will return you to your mother and her questions.”

“I wish you would not,” Spock replied, but his father had moved away.

“Well?” Mother prompted.

“What?”

“Oh, he must be very cute indeed. You are completely avoiding the question. I’d love to meet him.”

“Perhaps at some point you might. I should go, Mother. I am unpacking.”

“Okay, sweetie. Contact me tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow? I thought to be in contact only once a week.”

“With your father. I want to hear from you every day. Like an in person diary or something.”

Spock inwardly sighed. “Very well.”

“Thank you, Spock. Have a good day.” His screen went blank and Spock took the PADD off the dresser and put it in his book bag. He went to the window and looked out. From the window he could see all the way to the barn. Jim’s stepfather was leaning against the outside of it, smoke drifting from his person. He did not have a lot of experience with Terrans, other than his own mother, but there was something about that particular one Spock did not care for.

With a shake of his head, he returned to hanging up his clothes.


	3. Mom's Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I plan to update this one fairly often, so my apologies in advance if it becomes obnoxious for me to do so.

“Your mother’s on her way from the shuttle,” Frank said to Jim, who sat on the couch wondering how come he’d gotten kicked out of his own bedroom. “Go up and get that freak to come down.”

“You can’t keep calling him that. He’s going to hear you. And Mom won’t like it.”

“Fine,” Frank said with extreme exaggeration. “Go and get the _Vulcan_ and bring him down here.”

Jim got to his feet and braced himself for the shove he knew was coming. Sure enough, Frank pushed him with both hands on his arms. Because he was ready, he managed to stay upright and not stumble too much.

“And don’t tell me what I can and can’t say, little twerp. Do as you’re told.”

Jim went to the stairs and walked up them, perhaps a little slower than was necessary, but there was something in him that always made him want to push Frank just a little bit further. It was the reason in the first place he’d taken Frank’s car when Sam left. That seemed like a lifetime ago now. And Sam could go suck an egg.

He stopped at his bedroom door and made a face. Why the hell did he have to knock on his own door anyway? But he did. Not at all happy about it.

“Enter.”

Jim counted to five and then opened the door. Spock stood by the closet, putting a blue sweater on a hanger. “You know, it’s not really cold weather right now. I don’t know if you got misinformation or anything, but summer’s gonna be hot if all you have is sweaters.”

“It is not all I brought, however, Vulcan's temperatures are quite different than Terrans.”

“Oh. Okay.” Jim licked his lips. “Mom’s almost here, so if you want to meet her, you should come downstairs.”

“Of course.” Spock stepped into the closet and hung up the sweater.

It gave Jim a moment to survey his room to see if Spock had made any changes. Not that Jim was any big interior decorator or whatever. But his room was his room. And he was already a little weirded out having to share his space. Which in itself was weird because he’d hardly had privacy on Tarsus IV with Tabitha and her family even before the crops failed.

“I am ready.”

Jim started, realizing he must have been standing in something of a daze for several minutes. He wondered if the first words out of Spock’s mouth had been, “I met this odd human boy with zits all over his chin who stared into space all the time.” Okay, so maybe Vulcans didn’t use the word ‘zit’. It was probably too undignified. Jim certainly hated the word. He hated his horrible skin that went with the horrible word.

“This way,” Jim said, like he was some butler. God, what a nerd.

He walked down the hall well aware Spock trailed directly behind him. He regretted choosing his tightest jeans when he’d dressed that morning because they probably made his butt look big.

They were just stepping onto the stairs when he heard the front door open and his mother’s voice.

“I’m home,” she called.

“Hi, Sweetheart,” Frank said in an oily voice. Jim could hear their smooch. “How was the shuttle?”

“A little rocky to be honest.”

Jim’s mom would be home for a while, and Jim was glad. Because Frank was on his better behavior when she was around. But eventually, near the end of the summer, she would return to San Francisco and Starfleet, and go back up in another ship, once more leaving Jim with Frank.

“There’s my baby,” she said, smiling brightly as Jim stepped into the kitchen where she stood. “Come here.”

Jim went into her arms, hugging her tight, smelling her lily of the valley perfume. He was pretty sure he’d never forget that smell even if he lived to be a hundred. “Hi, Mom.”

“You’re still so thin.” She drew back, looking at him. “Are you eating? What did you have today?”

“An apple.”

“An apple? That’s it?” She turned to look at Frank.

“Hey, that’s all he wanted,” Frank protested. “Isn’t that right, Jim?”

Jim nodded, swallowing. “Yeah.”

“You have to eat more, baby.” She sighed. Pushed hair behind his ear. “You’re going to eat a big dinner. I’m going to make sure.” She released Jim and turned to Spock, holding her hand out in the ta’al. “You must be Spock.”

“I am, Commander Kirk. I have been looking forward to meeting you,” Spock said in a soft voice. He seemed so much quieter than Jim’s boisterous family.

 “Me, too.” She lowered her hand. “”Welcome. We’re thrilled to have you. I’ll start dinner shortly.”

“There is no rush. I know you just arrived.”

“I did, yes. I’m going to get a shower and change first but then I’ll start. I made sure my husband picked up some tea for you. I’m afraid the two of us are coffee drinkers and Jim has never really gotten into tea. Maybe you’ll influence him. Tea has wonderful health benefits.”

“Indeed.”

Jim tried not to flush, but wasn’t sure he was successful.

“Is there anything you need, Spock?”

“I do have a request.”

She smiled. “Yes?”

“Vulcans are very private. I would like to request that I be allowed to lock the bedroom door in the evening when I retire.”

“What?” Frank asked, his voice rising. “Listen, we don’t want any funny business between you and Jim.”

“Vulcans do not engage in funny business,” Spock replied in all seriousness, which only made Jim gape at him.

Mom laughed. “Of course you don’t. Frank, don’t be ridiculous. They’re just boys. Of course you can lock the bedroom door, Spock. Not really sure why Jim doesn’t want to at this point. I was a kid once.”

Jim pursed his lips and turned away. “I’ll get that tea started for you, Spock.”

“Thank you, Jim.”

“Wonderful,” Mom said. “I’m just going to run up and shower and change. I’ll be back down in just a bit.” She smiled at Frank, who to Jim’s utter mortification winked back. His stomach turned.

“You boys all right down here by yourselves for a bit?” Frank asked with a barely masked leer at Mom.

“Yes,” Jim said quickly, hoping his voice didn’t sound as choked as he thought.

“Jim, eat a snack,” Mom called over her shoulder as she and Frank headed up the stairs.

Jim closed his eyes briefly, and then when he opened them he saw Spock watching him. He blushed and opened the cabinet for a cup for the tea. 


	4. Dinner Interrupted

Spock had been unable to figure out what exactly it was about Frank Thatcher that Commander Kirk found appealing. She seemed to be an intelligent, reasonably attractive Terran woman with an exemplary Starfleet career. Her next assignment would be serving as Chief Engineer under Captain Christopher Pike.

She simply did not fit with Thatcher.

Commander Kirk had made dinner when she’d come down later, her hair still wet from her shower. She had announced to her son that she was making him a big batch of mashed potatoes and gravy as that was, apparently, one of Jim’s favorite things. In addition she had made rather a stew of root vegetables that had been quite pleasing in flavor, though Frank had mumbled about the lack of meat.

About halfway through the meal, Commander Kirk’s PADD had pinged.

With a sigh, she said, “Sorry about that. Let me check.” She picked it up, scanned a message and then shook her head. “I’m afraid I have to deal with this. Please continue to eat.”

She headed upstairs PADD in hand.

Jim watched her departure with what Spock could only think of as unease. He returned his gaze to his mound of mashed potatoes, his head bowed. He ate the potatoes with a spoon and in a large bowl that his mother had given him. He did seem to like them quite a bit.

The silence in the room was heavy, Spock noted, but he decided not to break it. Tension radiated off the young boy beside him, and hostility, if he was not mistaken, from Frank.

“Do you have to be such a pig when you eat?” Frank broke the silence at last. Spock wished he had not.

The spoon clanged down onto the table and Jim rose from his seat, discarding his food, and hurrying for the back door. Spock’s stomach dropped as his gaze rose to Frank’s. He tried not to flinch when the door shut behind Jim.

Frank, at least, did look uncomfortable. “Too sensitive. I’m going up to check on my wife.” He rose from the table, taking with him his own now empty plate and putting it in the sink before he went upstairs after Commander Kirk.

Spock rose also, but he picked up Jim’s bowl of mashed potatoes and gravy, covered it with a lid he found in the kitchen, and grabbed Jim’s spoon. He went out the door Jim had disappeared through.

“Jim?” Spock called softly, not wanting to startle the boy.

At first he didn’t see Jim, but then Spock spotted him sitting on the ground folded into himself near the edge of the barn. Spock walked over there with the bowl of potatoes. He could see immediately that there were tears on Jim’s cheeks, and he hesitated. He did not want to embarrass Jim any further than he likely was.

“May I sit with you?” he asked.

Jim wiped his face with the back of his hand. “Okay.”

Spock lowered himself to the ground beside the teen. “I brought your potatoes.”

Jim looked at the bowl, his bottom lip quivering. “Not hungry.”

“I know that is false,” Spock said softly. “I do not pretend to understand the behavior of your stepfather, but it reflects on him and not on you.” He pushed the bowl toward Jim. “Please eat.”

With a shaky breath, Jim took the bowl and the spoon from Spock. He removed the lid and scooped up some of the potatoes and gravy. “I’m sorry about that.”

“You do not owe any apologies, Jim.”

“Maybe not. For that. But I’m sorry you got stuck with us for the summer. I bet if you talked to your dad, they’d let you go back home.”

“Perhaps. But I am here to experience typical Terran life.”

Jim snorted at that. “I doubt we’re that typical.”

Spock once more urged Jim to eat when he saw that he hadn’t yet taken a bite. “I do not believe Terra is alone in its cruelty.”

Jim eyed him as he chewed the bite he had just taken. He shook his head.

“When I was a boy, I experienced prejudice from my fellow Vulcans,” Spock explained.

“For what?”

“Having a Human mother. My mixed biology has caused some consternation amongst my peers.”

Jim licked his lips and spooned up more potatoes. “I-I was on Tarsus IV.”

Spock exhaled very slowly. “I grieve with thee.”

The boy shrugged. “I think I’m past the grieving. Or I don’t know. Maybe I never will be. I don’t talk about it.” He toyed with the hem of his shirt. “I just…wanted you to know, that’s-that’s why I eat like that.”

“I do not find the way you eat questionable,” Spock assured him.

“No?”

Spock was struck by the hopeful note in Jim’s voice. It was painful. “No. You are fine the way you are, Jim. There is no need to change for others.”

Jim gave him just the tiniest smile, the first one really Spock had noticed, and he was struck by the beauty of it. Jim lowered his gaze to the potatoes. “These are really good. Did you want some?”

“I had some at the table and you are right, they are good.”

“Mom’s a good cook.”

“I hope that you do not find my question impertinent, but how did she find herself married to your stepfather?”

Jim rolled his eyes. “I think it was like physical. She met him right after. I mean, you know, when my dad was killed. You know about that?”

Spock nodded.

“She returned to Earth and somehow she met Frank. I guess women find him good looking or whatever. She did. Plus, you know, he wasn’t in Starfleet, which I think she needed at the time. I guess he filled something in her she needed.”

“I see.”

“Probably not, but that’s okay. Nobody else does either.” Jim took another bite of the potatoes. He had slowed way down from his rather frantic eating inside the house. “You sure you don’t want some?”

“I am sure.”

“Guess I should go back inside and clean up the kitchen. Don’t want Mom to have to do it and Frank won’t.” Jim finished off the rest of what was in the bowl.

“I will help you.” Spock stood up and reached down to help Jim up.

“Nah, I can get up, thanks.” Jim braced his hands on the barn wall and pulled himself up. “Thanks, Spock. You’re all right.”

Spock quirked a brow. “As are you, Jim.”


	5. Tripped and Fell

 

Jim opened his dresser drawer and pulled out his pajama bottoms and t-shirt he typically wore to bed. He cast what he hoped was a covert glance in Spock’s direction. The Vulcan teen was peering into the closet at the moment, seeming to pay little attention to Jim.

“I, uh, I’m going to go take a shower and stuff.”

Spock turned and looked at Jim. He nodded. “I am preparing to meditate if that is all right.”

“Meditate?”

“Vulcans practice meditation. It clears our minds and helps us maintain logic and reason.”

“Oh.” Jim chewed a piece of dry skin on his lip. “Whatever you want. I’ll be back in a little bit.”

Spock nodded and pulled a small mat out of the closet, which he brought over to beside the window.

For a moment, Jim stood at the door watching him, but then it occurred to him he was ogling his guest who probably didn’t want some dork staring at him. Jim slipped out the door, aware once more that Spock wasn’t paying any attention to him anyway.

He could hear slightly raised voices from the master bedroom but they weren’t clear enough for him to hear what was being said. He walked into the bathroom and closed and locked the door.

Jim decided to take a long, hot shower, so he turned on the water to warm it up and then went to look at himself in the mirror. He grimaced. After all this time you’d think modern medicine would have found a way to obliterate acne but no. Not only did it still exist, Jim had to be plagued by it. He squished out some puss on a particularly ugly one and then shuddered at the grossness of it.

After he washed his hands, he undressed and got into the shower.

It was just his luck that Spock had to be really hot. Jim had to lie in bed next to him and pretend he wasn’t totally into him. It would be a miracle if Jim didn’t wake up sporting a big time woody.  “Funny business” Frank had called it. Jim wished. But even if Spock liked guys, which Jim didn’t have that kind of luck, he wouldn’t like a skinny scrawny goofy looking kid like him. Jim was at least glad his teeth were straight. That was something anyway.

Not to mention Spock probably only liked Vulcans. Yeah, he’d said his mother was human but that didn’t mean Spock had any interest in humans himself. From what he could tell, Spock was more Vulcan than human. And who could blame him? Humans sucked.

Jim gingerly washed his side, mindful of the still sore giant bruise there. He didn’t know why he had to continually taunt Frank but he did. Maybe Jim had a death wish after all. Some of the stupid doctors had suggested so when he drove the car over the cliff. He didn’t really think he did, but maybe the doctors knew something he didn’t.

Funny thing was he wasn’t sorry to get away from Frank afterwards. He was initially excited about going to Tarsus IV, even if it was to stay with Frank’s sister, Tabitha. She hadn’t been physically abusive like her brother but she had been verbally, and Jim, as the child in her home that wasn’t hers, had taken the brunt of it. Still she hadn’t deserved the fate she’d gotten on Tarsus and Jim was sorry for it. Tabitha, her husband, John, and their three children had all been part of the genocide. Jim would be haunted by their screams of terror for his entire life, he was sure.

Jim turned off the water, tired of his own rumination, and stepped out of the shower to dry himself off. He pulled on his pajamas and then applied his medicinal cream to the acne all over his chin. He sighed, brushed his teeth, and finally left the bathroom, hopeful that Spock had finished his meditation.

Feeling weird, he cautiously opened the door and peered in. Spock was sitting on the mat, legs crossed, eyes closed.

_Great_.

Did he enter his room anyway and go to bed or did he make himself scarce and go downstairs?

Ultimately, Jim decided to go into his room. He did it as quietly as he could, then closed the door, and turned the lock. If there was one thing Spock had done, it was get permission to lock the door. Of course Jim had a feeling he’d pay for it later with Frank.

Jim took the clothes he’d worn that day and discarded them into the hamper. He missed a sock, so he bent down to pick it up.

“What is that?”

Jim jumped, turned to look at Spock, whose eyes were open and staring at Jim.

“What?”

Spock unfolded himself like it was nothing and stood. “On your side.”

Jim looked down. His shirt was in place. He frowned. “Huh?”

Spock reached for the hem of Jim’s shirt and lifted it up to reveal the bruise. “You are bruised.”

“Uh, yeah.” Jim said, pulling his shirt from Spock’s grasp and taking a step back.

“How did that happen?”

“I tripped and fell in the barn,” Jim mumbled. “Aren’t you meditating?”

“I have finished.”

“Oh. Well. Bathroom’s yours if you want. I’m gonna hit the hay.”

Spock tilted his head. “Hit the hay?”

“Go to bed. It means that.”

“Why not say that?”

“I don’t know.” Jim shrugged.

“Jim?” Spock asked, hesitation clear in his voice.

“Yeah?”

“Did you really trip and fall in the barn?”

Jim’s gaze slid from Spock’s. “Sure. That’s what I said, isn’t it?”

“Yes.”

Jim moved toward his bed, stepping over the mat that still lay on the floor. He lifted the covers and got in. “Goodnight.” 


	6. Born to Be Wild

Spock was not a late sleeper. He also was a light sleeper, waking easily at any little movement or noise. Therefore he was surprised to wake up and find the spot next to him on the bed empty.  He sat up and realized the room was empty as well. He spotted Jim’s digital time piece and saw that it was already past nine. Quite unlike him.

He threw back the cover and rose, turning back to make the bed look presentable. As he went to Jim’s side to straighten it, he glanced out the window and saw Jim standing beside his stepfather just outside the barn. Spock moved closer, though such an action was illogical.  

It appeared to be tense between Jim and the adult. Spock could see that from where he stood. Frank took a step toward Jim that could only be considered threatening and when Jim took a step back, Spock realized he was holding his breath. Jim held up his hands defensively and he looked so small and vulnerable Spock found himself wishing he was down there putting himself between the boy and Frank.

Then Frank turned away, stomping back into the barn. Spock exhaled slowly.

Jim glanced toward the barn, his fists clenched. Then with a shake of his head he walked toward the house.

Spock went to the drawer in the dresser he’d been given for use and remove his underwear and then got dressed in black slacks and a burgundy sweater Mother had knitted for him. By the time Jim opened the bedroom door, Spock was ready.

Jim gave him an all too rare smile. “Good morning. Just came to see if you were awake.”

“I am.”

“I see. Breakfast is ready if you’re hungry. Mom made pancakes. You haven’t lived until you’ve had Mom’s pancakes.”

“I look forward to them. Jim?”

“Yeah?”

Spock hesitated. “Are you…well?”

The smile Jim had been wearing slipped from his face. “I’m fine.”

“Fine has variable definitions.” And Spock did not believe he was fine.

Jim, predictably, ignored his statement. “Let’s go to breakfast.”

Commander Kirk-Thatcher stood at the stove and she smiled when they came downstairs. “There’s plates of pancakes already on the table. Help yourselves.” She handed a small plate of breakfast sausages to Jim as he walked past her.

Jim settled at the table and Spock took the seat directly next to him.

“Frank’s already eaten,” the commander said. “So have I, really. Is that enough for you two or did you want more?”

Jim eyed the plate of pancakes, taking three of them, as well as the plate of six sausages. “It’s enough.”

She nodded. “I have a conference with Captain Pike. I’m going to take it in the den.”

“Okay, Mom.”

She went over to Jim, and ruffled his hair. “Can you go into town later and get a few groceries? I left you a list and my credit chip.”

“Okay. Can I take Spock with me?”

“Of course.” She took her PADD and went down the hallway to what Spock presumed was the “den.”

“Might as well show you the town and other things,” Jim said. He slathered his pancakes with butter and then poured maple syrup over them and the sausages.

“Indeed.”

Spock tried not to watch Jim eat for he had already figured out Jim was self-conscious about it, but he didn’t fail to notice that Jim ate as though he thought someone might take it from him at any moment. He even sort of blocked his plate with his arms in front of it. Spock would give up his own food for Jim rather than take any, but Jim had obviously experienced something else on Tarsus IV.

“These pancakes are good, you are correct,” Spock commented.

Jim smiled again and it loosened something in Spock he wasn’t even aware of had been wound up.

“You have a pleasing smile,” Spock blurted out before he could think better of it.

Jim’s cheeks turned red and he ducked his head. “Yeah? You think?”

Spock nodded, feeling his own cheeks become warmer. “Affirmative.”

Jim licked his lips, kept his gaze on his pancakes. “Thanks.”

****

Spock followed Jim down a long dirt road that led from the farmhouse. When they’d first left the house, Jim had cast a glance in the direction of the barn, but he’d said nothing, just turned and started down the path.

Jim wore really tight jeans and he had shoved his hands into the pockets. He had on a short sleeved blue t-shirt that seemed made to bring out the blue of his eyes. It was quite successful.

“We’ll go into town in a bit,” Jim said. “First I want to show you something.”

“Very well.”

Jim glanced back toward the house which was now quite far away. Then, he turned left and walked another mile or so before he stopped in front of some brush. He pushed aside the high weeds to reveal a motorbike.

“What is this?” Spock asked.

Jim grinned, brighter than any smile Spock had yet seen. “She’s mine. I keep her here so they don’t know. If they did—” Jim shrugged. “Get on.”

“What?”

Jim swung his legs over the seat and got onto the motorbike. “Get on. Behind me. Trust me, Spock.”

Spock stared at him a moment. Then he placed himself behind Jim on the motorbike.

Jim said something that might have been, “Hold on.”

“Excuse me?” Spock asked.

“Hold. On.” Jim started the bike and the engine roared to life. “I can go pretty fast.”

“Should we not be wearing appropriate headgear?”

“Nah, we don’t need it.”

Suddenly the motorbike moved away from the brush and the farmhouse with rapidly increasing speed. Spock gripped Jim’s waist, alarmed at how fast Jim was going. But he was also mindful of Jim’s bruise, so he kept his hand on that side higher than the bruise.

“Okay back there?” Jim yelled.

“No. You are going too fast.” They went over a bump in the road that caused both of them to rise up from the seat and then back down again.

Jim laughed. It was the first time Spock had heard it and it rolled through him like thunder.


	7. Getting to Know You, Getting to Know All About You

Jim stopped the bike by trail and turned it off.

“Where are we?” Spock asked.

Jim was very aware Spock still held on to him and he wasn’t eager to dislodge him either but well. They’d reached their destination. He got off and as he did Spock’s hands slipped away from him.

“Just some place I wanted to show you. Most people think there’s not much to Riverside or the area around it and yeah, that’s mostly true. But I found a place I like.”

Spock got off the bike too and for just a moment he seemed to sway just a bit.

“You okay, Spock?”

“I am uncertain. I think I am experiencing mild motion sickness.”

“Oh. Yeah. Probably. But going fast is fun, yeah?” Jim grinned.

“It is…interesting.”

Jim noticed Spock’s carefully arranged hair was windblown and out of place. He looked super cute and if Jim had any guts at all he’d reach up and straighten for him. But he didn’t. Spock was the cutest guy Jim had ever seen in his life and he didn’t have the guts.

“This way.” Jim turned toward the short trail.

“Will the bike be all right where it is?” Spock asked.

“Sure. No one comes this way much except me.”

For about a half a mile or so the trail was pretty straightforward, but then it started into twists and turns for another mile and a half before it reached the copse of trees Jim was looking for.

“Where does this lead?”

“You’ll see.”

The trees were close now and Jim almost reached for Spock’s hand but stopped himself in time. First, he’d heard Vulcans didn’t go for touching and second, Spock wasn’t his boyfriend or anything and would probably think it weird if Jim held his hand.

“Here.” He gestured for Spock to step forward and see his meadow just beyond the trees. Being late spring, almost summer, it was covered in yellow and blue wild flowers. He licked his lips while he watched Spock’s gaze roam over it.

“I have never seen anything like it,” Spock said softly.

“Yeah,” Jim whispered. “Come on.”

Jim went into the meadow, about the middle of it and then plopped down, lying on his back. He could see Spock’s hesitation and grinned. “It’s safe, you know. Maybe a few bees but unless you try to squash ‘em they’re far more interested in the flowers than us.”

Spock nodded and then carefully placed himself next to Jim in the meadow, lying back with what to Jim was exaggerated caution.

“See how blue the sky looks?”

“As blue as your eyes,” Spock replied.

Jim’s face heated. “Uh. Not sure about that. But it’s cool, huh? I come here sometimes. You know to get away when-when things get bad.”

Spock’s face turned toward him and he could feel Spock’s stare. “Are they bad a lot, Jim?”

“Well.” Jim shrugged. “I don’t know. I got sent to Tarsus IV for bad behavior. I mean, sure, they-they didn’t know what would happen. But still.”

“What did you do?”

Jim sighed. “I drove one of Frank’s classic cars over a cliff.”

“I see.”

“Probably not. But that’s okay.”

“Jim—”

“Okay, we should go.” Jim straightened up and stood. “We still have to take the bike back and go into town.”

Spock stood also. “Why do we not take it into town?”

Jim laughed. “Because I’m not supposed to have it. And I can just imagine some well-meaning asshole telling Frank I have it.”

“Forgive me but when you speak of an asshole that is a derogatory term, correct?”

“Uh, yeah.” Jim thought Spock saying asshole was really weird.

“How can an asshole be well-meaning?”

Jim nodded. “You’ve got me there, Spock.”

“I assume this means you do not have a license to operate the motorbike?” Spock asked as they started back on the trail.

“A license? No.”

“How did you obtain it?”

Jim shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans. It was either that or reach for Spock’s hand which he could _not_ do. “Bought it. Cheap. I kind of fixed it up myself.”

“How did you have the skills to do that?”

“Frank’s brother-in-law, John, on Tarsus IV.  He taught me. Pretty much the only thing good I got out of that.” They’d reached the bike again and this time Spock got on without hesitation. “You think you’ll be okay?”

“Yes.”

“You aren’t going to barf or anything, are you?”

“Not at present.”

“Okay, hold on.” Jim tried to push aside the little thrill he felt when Spock gripped his waist. He started the bike and made his way back toward the hiding place.

****

“Do Vulcans eat ice cream?” Jim asked Spock as he stopped before the frozen section in the grocery store.

“I do not know.”

“You don’t know? You’ve never had it?”

“Negative.”

“Well, it’s got like dairy products. You eat those?”

“I abstain from meat.”

“Nah, there’s none of that in ice cream. What flavor should we get?”

“Flavor?”

Jim shook his head. “You really don’t know, huh? Chocolate?”

“Definitely not. We do not do well with Chocolate.”

“Hmm. Okay, how about the caramel vanilla swirl”

Spock gave him a little shrug.

“Okay, that’s the one.” Jim opened the door of the freezer case.

“Hey, Freak Boy, who’s the freak with you?”

Jim froze. Didn’t bother to turn around, because he knew exactly who spoke to him. Finnegan. Jim’s school nemesis.

“Pointy-eared freak,” Finnegan said, standing next to them.

Jim turned to face Finnegan who was accompanied by his friend, Dixon. “Shut up, Finnegan.”

“Shut up, Finnegan,” he mocked. “Stupid little zit-faced runt. Figures you’d hang out with other freaks. He’s probably your _boyfriend_.”

Jim felt rage build with him.  “I said, shut up!” He took a step toward Finnegan and pushed him hard so that he flew across the aisle and into the opposite case.

“You bastard!” Finnegan came at Jim immediately, his face red with anger.

Jim braced himself to be hit when—

“Ouch, fuck,” Finnegan swore.

Spock held Finnegan's arm twisted behind his back. He said in a very calm voice, “You will not touch him.”

Finnegan whimpered. Jim noticed Dixon had fled, leaving his friend behind.

“Spock, it’s okay. Let him go.”

Spock released Finnegan’s arm. Finnegan immediately started rubbing his arm.

“I’m not gonna forget this, Kirk,” Finnegan vowed, then left the aisle.

Jim bit his lip. “Thanks for that. He’s a jerk.”

“Clearly. The ice cream?” Spock reached in and pulled out the container of ice cream. “Shall we?”

“Yeah.”  Jim smiled. And if he looked at Spock with a little bit of hero worship he was pretty sure the Vulcan didn’t notice.  


	8. There's Freedom in Your Eyes

 

“Spock! What a surprise.”

“A surprise, Mother? You told me to contact you.”

Mother laughed. “Well, yes, I know. But you actually did it without me having to hound you.”

“I endeavor to be obedient whenever possible, Mother,” Spock replied.

She smiled. “Yes I know. How is your second day there?”

“Satisfactory.”

She sighed. “That’s not very descriptive. Where is Jim?”

“He left me alone to given me privacy.”

“Oh. Well, I really want to meet him, Spock. He’s going to be a part of your life for a few months and I want to meet him.” She shook her head. “I want to see if he is as cute as you say he is.”

“I have not said he is cute.”

Mother grinned. “Haven’t you? But he is, isn’t he?”

Spock shrugged slightly. “He is physically appealing. Quite thin, though.” Spock hesitated. “He experienced the famine on Tarsus IV.”

Mother’s eyes widened and became sorrowful. “That poor boy. With his family?”

“Negative. I was given the impression from Jim he was sent there as a form of discipline for a youthful indiscretion.”

“That’s horrible.”

Spock, of course, agreed, but it was not his place to question the decisions of Jim’s parents. And as Jim had pointed out, they did not know of what was to come.

“Next time, I want to meet him.”

“Very well. I will attempt to have him here but I can offer no guarantees he will agree. He is rather bashful about certain things.”

“How’s the weather? Are you comfortable?”

“So far, yes.”

A short time later he had disconnected with Mother, and decided to go in search of Jim. He left the bedroom and walked down the stairs. He heard voices coming from the direction of the den, and he turned toward that, thinking perhaps Jim was in there with his mother.

He stopped just outside the door when he heard the Commander’s voice.

“I miss you, too. I know. It won’t be that long. I promise.”

Spock turned and went in the other direction and it soon became clear Jim was not in the house. Nor was Frank and for some reason that made Spock uneasy. He suspected Jim’s stepfather was a cruel individual and had perhaps been responsible for Jim’s bruise. He had internally vowed to keep an eye on the situation.

He made his way outside and turned toward the barn as the most likely place Jim or Frank or both might be.

Frank was bent over and leaning into an old car when Spock reached the barn. He glanced up. “Oh. Hello. Was there something you wanted?”

“I was looking for Jim.”

Disdain passed over Frank’s face but it quickly disappeared and his expression returned to neutrality. “I think he went for a walk somewhere. I wanted him to help me with the car but he kept dropping shit.” At Spock’s raised eyebrow, Frank flushed slightly. “Tools. He kept dropping tools. Anyway, I told him he might as well beat it, fat lot a good he was to me.”

Spock did not particularly appreciate Frank’s way of speaking but he was able to determine that Frank had decided Jim wasn’t helping and sent him away.

“Thank you for the information.”

“Sure. You see him, remind him he has chores to do.”

Spock took a path that wound around the back of the barn and out toward what looked like a single plum tree. He saw no sign of Jim and was about to turn around and head back to the farmhouse.

“Hey.”

Spock looked up. Jim was dangling from his ankles from a high branch on the tree. “What are you doing?”

Jim laughed. He was upside down, his face flushed dark red. “I think you can see what I’m doing.”

“You should come down from there. Climbing trees can be dangerous.”

“Lots of things can be dangerous. Crossing the street sometimes if your timing is off. Some aren’t even worth the danger. But climbing? That’s totally worth it.” Jim swung up to another branch, upright, Spock noted with a little bit of begrudging admiration, and he climbed down, jumping the last few feet to the ground. He held an plum in his hand.

“How often do you climb this tree?” Spock wondered as Jim sat down, against the tree trunk.

Jim patted the spot next to him and in spite of Spock’s reluctance to get dirty, he sat down anyway. “This tree? Oh, dozens of times. Mostly when I was younger. Sam and I used to do it a lot.”

“Your brother?”

“Yep. Ex-brother.”

“Why ex?”

Jim shrugged. “He took off at fifteen. Haven’t heard from him since. At first Mom tried to find him but no matter who she contacted there was no sign of him. No idea what happened to him. Don’t really care either.” Jim’s bottom lip stuck out in such a way that Spock decided despite his words Jim most certainly did care. Jim pointed with his thumb to a heart-shaped carving in the tree that read GSK + AD. “He put that there. George Samuel Kirk plus Agnes Dixon. Older sister of that guy who was with Finnegan at the grocery store. They went together for a bit. But even Agnes had no clue where he went. Or she said she didn’t anyway.”

“Perhaps something unfortunate befell him.”

“Maybe. But then you’d think we’d find his remains or something.” Jim shrugged again. “I don’t know. Whatever. He didn’t want to be my brother anyway.” Jim took a bite of the plum he held.

Spock was surprised when Jim held it out toward him. He blinked.

“Try it. It’s good.” Jim didn’t let go of the plum and Spock understood he was just supposed to lean in and bite it.

Spock did just that, his gaze on Jim’s the entire time, and as his teeth sunk into the plum, he felt as though he were drowning in those eyes.

“My mother would like to meet you,” Spock heard himself say after he had swallowed the bite of plum.

Jim’s face scrunched up. “Why?”

“She would like to meet the youth I am spending the summer with. And she believes she will like you.”

Jim’s gaze lowered and he stared at the plum. “No, she won’t.”

“Why will she not?”

“Because no one does.”

“That is not true. And my mother will like you.”

Jim shook his head.

“I like you.”

His gaze rose at that, blue eyes wide. “You-you do?”

Spock found he could not look away from those blue eyes like the sky over the meadow and the golden hair above like las’hark. He nodded. “Yes.”

“Well.” Jim licked his lips, gaze sliding away from Spock’s. “You’re about the only one then.”

“I do not believe that can be true. And I know my mother will.” Spock glanced up at the sky. “I was told to remind you that you had chores.”

Jim sighed. “Yeah.”

“I would be glad to assist you in executing them.” Spock lowered his gaze from the sky to see that Jim was watching him. Spock felt his skin prickle with goose bumps.

Very slowly Jim smiled and illogically Spock’s heart beat increased. “That would be sweet.”

Before Spock could reply to that oddity, Jim held out the plum again and Spock took another bite, then so did Jim. They finished the plum that way, trading bites.

“It’s good, huh?”

Spock agreed. “We do not have plums on Vulcan, I do find them pleasing.”

“Still. I bet Vulcan is cool.”

“It is hot.”

Jim burst out laughing, then stood. “You’re funny. Come on, let’s go do those chores.”


	9. Intimacy

“What the hell are you doing?”

Jim tried not to tense, tried not to shrink into himself. Showing weakness to Frank didn’t earn mercy, it made everything worse. He’d been about to take the ice cream out of the freezer when Frank had snuck up behind him.

Jim continued taking the carton out, closed the freezer. “Getting ice cream for Spock and me.”

“Who told you that you could do that?” Frank asked, hands on his hips.

“Mom.”

“Figures. She spoils your ass. I guess you’re better than your piece of shit brother anyway.” Frank continued to stand there staring. “Don’t take too much. And try not to be a hog about it.”

Jim didn’t respond as he set the ice cream carton on the counter and reached into the cabinet for two bowls.

“Did you hear me?”

“Yes, I heard you.”

Frank moved quickly and grabbed Jim’s wrist, closing his fingers tightly over it. “Answer me then, you little shit.” 

“You’re hurting me,” Jim said softly, knowing to struggle would only bring more pain.

“You aren’t gonna cry are you?”

“No.”

He squeezed harder. “I could break this thin little wrist of yours. You’re still nothing but skin and bones.” He finally released Jim’s wrist, flinging it so it hit the counter. Jim didn’t flinch though it had hurt. “I still don’t get it. Why that Kodos fella didn’t kill you along with my dumbass sister and her family. _Eugenics_. Obviously he didn’t know what he was doing.”

Jim couldn’t hide the quiver of his bottom lip from the mention of Kodos because Frank saw it and sneered.

“Don’t be such a pussy, boy.”

“I’m not.”

“Oh, that’s right, you don’t like pussy. You like dick.” Frank narrowed his eyes.  “Don’t you?”

“No,” Jim denied.

“You’d better not. Because I’ll beat the shit out of you if I find out different. Your mother be damned.” Frank glanced toward the stairs. “I’m going up to bed. Don’t leave a mess.”

Jim watched Frank leave the kitchen and then head up the stairs. Biting his lip, he rubbed his wrist. He’d have a bruise. For a moment he just stared at the carton of ice cream and bowls. Tears welled in his eyes and he thought of Sam and how he’d refused to take Jim with him when he left and had never looked back, not once, even when Jim kept pleading with him to stay.

Jim grabbed a napkin and wiped his eyes. Crying didn’t help anything and Sam was gone forever. Just like Spock would be gone when the summer was over and his mom too. It would be just him and Frank again and Frank would continue to use him as his favorite punching bag.

He’d thought about running away himself. Anything had to be better than this. But then he remembered no one ever heard anything about Sam again. Mom even with all her connections never found out. Jim didn’t want to end up as a permanently missing person. At least if Frank finally killed him, Mom would know what happened.

He dished out the ice cream and returned the carton to the freezer before shutting off the lights downstairs and heading up the stairs with the bowls.

 Jim felt stupid again having to knock on his own bedroom door but he did. He waited for the formal “enter” before he juggled the bowls and turned the knob, stepping into his room.

Spock was rising from his meditation mat, dressed in what sort of looked like a Karate Gi but with no colored slash. He walked past Jim and over to the door, closing and locking it behind him.

“You really meant it when you wanted to lock that door,” Jim said.

“I did, yes.” Spock took the bowl of ice cream Jim handed to him. “You were gone for longer than I expected. Was there an issue?”

“No,” Jim said quickly, though he sensed from Spock’s stare that the Vulcan did not quite believe him. “Just giving you time to meditate.”

“This is your room, Jim. You may enter it at any time.”

“I don’t want to disturb you.”

“You will not. Part of the meditation process is being able to ignore outside elements,” Spock replied.

Jim smiled a little at that. “Not sure anyone could totally ignore me. Anyway, try your ice cream.”

Spock took a tiny spoonful of the ice cream and put it in his mouth. As usual his expression gave nothing away.

“Well?”

Spock nodded. “It is…as I believe you would say…tasty.”

Jim laughed at that and for some reason Spock’s cheeks turned a little green as they had did earlier when they were outside. Jim would think it was Spock’s version of blushing but he couldn’t imagine anything making a Vulcan blush.

They both finished their ice cream in silence and then while Spock left to take a shower, Jim dressed in his pajamas and got into bed. He was still lying awake on his back when Spock returned to the bedroom and locked the door.

As Spock turned off the lights and pulled back the covers to get in beside Jim, Jim turned to face Spock.

“You are still awake?” Spock asked in an almost whisper.

“Yeah.”

“I saw a bruise forming on your wrist.”

Jim swallowed. It sounded loud in the quiet room. “I hit it on the counter.”

“May I?”

Before Jim could even contemplate what Spock was asking, Spock’s fingers were stroking the forming bruise on his wrist with aching gentleness.

“Does that hurt?”

“N-No. Feels kind of warm, like you have tiny little heating pads in your fingers.”

“Your wrist feels warm to my fingers as well. Your bones are fragile.”

“I-I still haven’t gained back all my weight.”

Spock’s fingers caressed up Jim’s palm, causing a shiver to go up Jim’s spine. Everywhere Spock touched felt heated. Then Spock’s longer fingers touched Jim’s, his index and middle fingers. The warmth spread throughout Jim.

“That’s…are you doing that?”

“Yes,” Spock whispered. “We are…sharing a Vulcan kiss.”

Jim’s breath hitched, but he didn’t move his fingers away, though his heart was beating madly.

“I apologize if I am being too forward.”

“No.” Jim licked his lips. “It’s-it’s nice.”

“I, too, find it pleasing. Goodnight, Jim.”

“Goodnight.” Spock didn’t move his fingers from Jim’s and so Jim didn’t move his either. He closed his eyes and fell asleep.  


	10. A Luxury

Spock was surprised to find himself once more alone when he woke in the morning. It was earlier than he’d awakened the day before. Barely seven in the morning, yet Jim’s side of the bed was once more barren.

He wondered at his own behavior last night with the teen. It had never been his practice to be so familiar with another in his age group. Or any age group really. Yet he had been compelled to offer comfort to Jim and Spock found that he was not comfortable with the human preference of embracing. Still the gesture of Vulcan affection was surely not an appropriate expression of comfort for someone Spock had barely known a couple of days.

And yet, Jim had seemed welcoming of the gesture. Not to mention Spock had felt an entirely unexpected warmth flow throughout him at Jim’s touch. Since he had never shared such a gesture with another, Spock was uncertain if that was the correct result of such an intimate occurrence.

Spock chose his clothes for the day and left the room to go to the hall bathroom. There were signs that Jim had taken a shower but no other direct sign of Jim. His mother and stepfather’s door remained closed.

When Spock had finished getting ready, he made his way downstairs but there was still no sign of Jim. Spock made himself tea in a travel cup and then went outside to seek out the other teen.

No matter where Spock looked he could not locate Jim. He went past the fruits trees even, almost to what appeared to be someone else’s property. He was about to turn around and go back to the farmhouse when he heard what sounded like very faint crying.

Spock hesitated, looking around. He did not see Jim. Across the property over a white waist high fence was a small wooden building. Spock’s personal research indicated it was called a shed. And Spock’s Vulcan hearing told him the crying came from there.

If the occupant was not Jim, Spock would have some awkward explaining to do. But if it was Jim crying in there, he could not simply ignore it.

Spock went over to the fence, climbed over it and went to the shed. “Jim?” he called softly. The crying ceased. He tapped lightly on the door, which was off its hinges, and then opened it.

Jim was on the ground, knees drawn up to his chest. His face was tilted up to look at Spock and he could see Jim’s cheeks were streaked with tears.

“You are crying.”

“No, I’m not,” Jim denied, wiping at his face.

“You are. I can see the tears.”

Jim looked mutinous as he frantically wiped at his cheeks, causing them to become redder and blotchier. “You weren’t supposed to see that. Go away.”

Spock straightened. “I apologize for invading your privacy.” He turned to leave.

“Wait.”

Jim’s words were soft, almost a whisper and so filled with desolation Spock’s heart twisted.

“You-you can stay.”

Spock approached Jim carefully and then sat down next to him in the shed.

"Tea?" Spock held out his travel mug.

Jim shook his head.

After several minutes of silence, he ventured, “What has happened?”

“Nothing.”

“But you have been crying.”

Jim nodded. “Sometimes, I just do. I get-I just…”

Spock reached for Jim’s arm and turned it over to look at the wrist and the bruises there. “Those are fingertips.”

Jim said nothing.

“Your stepfather?”

Jim closed his eyes but didn’t respond.

Spock scooted closer. “How often does he hurt you, Jim?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“What is this place?”

“It belongs to old man Miller. Sam and I used to come here when-when we wanted to get away from Frank.”

“Does Mr. Miller known?”

“I think so. He’s never said anything to Frank though and he never chased us away.”

“Have you told your mother?” Spock asked gently.

“She doesn’t want to know. I tried. Before. When I was sent away. She wouldn’t listen. Sometimes I think she married him so she’d have a babysitter and could do whatever she wanted.”

“She cannot fail to see.”

Jim snorted at that. “He doesn’t do it when she’s around.”

Spock’s thumb stroked up to Jim’s palm. “Apparently he does.”

“No. That was nothing. I don’t even think he meant to do that, really. He just didn’t want me to have any ice cream. Everything’s still fragile and I bruise easy.”

“Do not make excuses for him.”

“I’m not. I’m just saying. This-this isn’t anything compared to other shit.”

“I cannot keep silent.”

Jim shook his head. “You can’t say anything, Spock. And anyway, you aren’t here to save me. You’re here to see what Humans are like on Terra. And I guess-I guess now you know.” He shook his head. “Impressive, huh?”

“Jim, you are being physically abused. We must say something.”

“No!” Jim practically shouted. “You know what they’ll do? They’ll send me away again. Some place worse than Tarsus.”

“I cannot imagine there is a place worse.”

“If it’s out there, they’ll find it. Or they’ll put me in foster care. Or I’ll have to run away and become just a statistic like Sam. I can’t have any of that happen, Spock. You don’t know what it’s like.”

“But you are being mistreated.”

“It could be so much worse. I know what to do, I know how to escape. All of this? It’s better than the unknown. I knew a boy on Tarsus named Kevin and he’d been in foster care all his life and most of the people who were supposed to take care of him…didn’t. He’d been molested most of his life from those who were supposed to save him. And then he ended up in shithole like Tarsus. I have food here. Do you know what it’s like to wonder where you’re going to find food?”

“Jim—”

“You don’t! You don’t know. Trying to find edible garbage that doesn’t make you puke. Sorting through maggots just to find one thing that will sort of fill your belly. Finally finding one scrap of bread and then giving it to someone else who needs it more than you. Right now, it’s okay. I have food. I don’t have to fight for it. I had _ice cream_ last night. Do you know what a luxury that was?” His eyes filled with tears again. “And even when I was eating it, do you know how I felt?”

“No,” Spock whispered.

“Guilty. I felt guilty. You just need to mind your own business.”

Jim’s bottom lip quivered and then he scrambled to his feet. He wiped at his eyes again, opened the door, and went out.


	11. The Beautiful Things I'm Learning About You

Jim was bent over, peering into the truck engine when a noise behind him made him stiffen. He looked over his shoulder. Relaxed.

“Oh, it’s you.”

“What are you doing?” Spock asked.

“Baking cookies.” He rolled his eyes. “What’s it look like?” He straightened out of the truck and closed the hood. “Can you hand me that rag?”

Spock reached over to the red rag that hung on a hook in the barn and handed it to Jim, who wiped his hands. “You really know how to fix cars?”

Jim shrugged. “A bit, I guess. You talk to your mom?”

“Yes. Where are your mother and stepfather?”

“They’ll be gone all day,” Jim said, not bothering to hide his gladness of it. “They were going to Iowa City. Mom likes to spend the day there sometimes. They do shopping and lunch. That sort of thing.”

“They did not wish for you to accompany them?”

“No, thank God. I can’t imagine having to do that.” Jim opened the driver’s door of the truck and got in. He turned the old key and it started right up. “How’s it sound?”

“Satisfactory.”

Jim turned it off and got back out. He couldn’t quite meet Spock’s eyes because of their earlier conversation at Miller’s shed. He sort of wanted to apologize to Spock for the way he acted, but he wasn’t quite sure how to go about it.

“You, uh, you want to take a ride on the cycle?” he asked instead.

“That would be a good use of our time.”

Jim smiled a little. “Is that the way all Vulcans talk?”

“Clarify.”

His smile widened. “It’s cute. Come on.” Spock followed dutifully after him. “You might want to get a jacket.” They went into the house and both got jackets. Jim eyed Spock. “You want gloves?”

“Negative.”

“Negative,” he repeated. Jim shook his head and grabbed Spock’s arm to tug him out of the house. “Let’s go.”

They walked down the road to where the bike was hidden in silence. Spock wasn’t particularly talkative on a good day, Jim had already learned, and he could tell the Vulcan boy was being extra cautious around him at the moment.

As they got onto the motorcycle, Spock asked, “Are we going to the meadow?”

“You want to?”

“I believe it would be pleasant.”

“Okay, sure.”

When they reached his secret area and the got off and parked the bike, Jim thought maybe he should say something.

“Spock?”

“Yes, Jim?”

He bit his lip and looked away. “Nothing. Let’s go to the meadow.”

Jim let Spock go on ahead of him and if he spent some time looking at Spock’s ass, well, he guessed Spock wouldn’t know about it or anything.

Spock automatically went to the meadow and laid down and so with a small smile, Jim laid next to him, both of them staring up at the sky.

“Are you mad at me?” Jim asked after a while.

“I am not.”

“That’s good.” Jim sighed a little. “I don’t really have a lot of friends. I’d hate to think you didn’t want to be my friend anymore.” He hesitated, stomach doing a flip-flop. “That is…if you are my friend.”

“I am your friend, Jim,” Spock said quietly. “I do not have a lot of friends either.”

Jim didn’t know why that was because Spock was amazingly cool. He turned his head to look at Spock. “Can I ask you something?”

“You may.”

“Remember that-that Vulcan k-kiss?”

“It is doubtful I would forget it.”

His face felt like it was on fire. “Have you ever tried a human kiss?”

“I have not.”

“Would you…want to?”

Spock turned his head until he was looking at Jim, who was holding his breath. “You may proceed.”

His breath whooshed out of him. “Okay.” He was pretty sure his voice just cracked. Jim scooted closer to Spock. Spock was watching him very intently.

Jim hadn’t ever kissed anyone. But he’d seen it. He knew what you were supposed to do. But knowing and doing were totally different, he realized, as he leaned over Spock, just above his lips.

Spock’s lips were just a little parted as Jim tilted his head so he wouldn’t hit Spock’s nose. He knew that much. His lips felt dry and he almost licked them but then thought maybe Spock wouldn’t appreciate him having wet lips. Jim closed his eyes and placed a very quick kiss on Spock’s lips. He pulled back instantly, opened his eyes, and stared at Spock.

“How was that?”

“It was not long enough to make a determination,” Spock replied.

“Oh. I’m not—I haven’t.” Jim huffed out a breath. “Should I try it again?”

Spock nodded.

Jim closed his eyes again and leaned in to touch his lips to Spock’s mouth. This time he lingered ten seconds before pulling away. His whole body was tingling.

“Well?” he whispered.

“I require more time to determine,” Spock replied.

“A longer one?”

Spock nodded again.

Jim swallowed. “ ’kay.”

This time he touched his fingers to Spock’s jaw, as he’d seen done in movies, closed his eyes and pressed his mouth to Spock’s lips. The previous times Spock had just sort of laid there, but this time Jim felt Spock’s lips press back. And that was-that was—

Oh, jeez.

Jim pressed himself against Spock, crawling onto him to get his lips more onto Spock’s. Spock’s hand had curled behind Jim’s neck, pulling him closer. And then Jim remembered you were supposed to use your tongue. He jabbed his tongue past Spock’s still slightly parted lips, seeking out Spock’s tongue. It was warm and surprisingly rough, sort of like a cat’s tongue but not quite.

And, oh, God, Spock’s fingers had found those of his other hand and he was Vulcan kissing Jim at the same time as they were human kissing.

Jim pulled away gasping. Spock’s eyes were dilated. He realized he was lying across Spock.

“I—” He did lick his lips then, could still taste Spock.

“Indeed.” Spock let out a shaky breath and gently eased Jim back to beside him instead of on top of him. “I believe that is sufficient experimentation for both of us for the time being.”

“Y-Yeah.” Jim rubbed his chest. “Was that okay?”

“I am certain you know the answer to that, Jim.” Spock sounded out of breath.

“Does that-do you think…does that make us, um, boyfriends or-or whatever?”

“I believe that would be the proper term.”

“Wow.”

“Indeed,” Spock said again.

“Does that mean you-you kind of like me? Like, you know, that way.”

“Clearly.”

Jim was warm all over and fairly abuzz with arousal. Since he’d passed puberty he’d jerked himself off a few times, but he was careful, considering. But he’d never felt like this. And never for someone else like this. Because of someone else. And with it being Spock, a Vulcan of all things, Jim just didn’t know what to do with that.

“Perhaps we should make our way back to the farmhouse now?” Spock suggested.

“Yeah, okay.” Jim sat up. He reached over and touched his fingers to Spock and was surprised when Spock shuddered.

“I believe now is not the time for more kissing.” Spock sat up himself, and turned away, and Jim realized he wasn’t the only one who found their experimental kissing stimulating.  


	12. When I Go to Sleep at Night, You're always a Part of My Dreams

Spock had never had a boyfriend before, nor even thought about the prospect of having one in the near future. Eventually he would need a mate. But he had anticipated it would be a mutually beneficial arrangement with a Vulcan mate that he would likely only have to deal with every seven years during his time. They would not be required to cohabitate together.

But that was before he met Jim.

Now he had a boyfriend. And there was something definitely different with Jim. When they touched, it felt…right. Spock felt tempted to meld with Jim whenever their skin connected. He held back. He could never violate Jim in such a manner. Jim would have to agree to allow it. But his mind yearned for the connection just the same.

Spock had never expected to enjoy human kissing. The times he touched his fingers to Jim’s in a Vulcan kiss had been most stimulating. But when they’d human kissed…Spock had to stop thinking about it. He became aroused all over again when he did. Jim was young. Spock was the elder.

Commander Kirk and her husband returned from their daytrip too soon for Spock. They returned with something they called pizza for the boys to eat for dinner. The commander than went into another room to communicate with her superiors while Jim and Spock sat at the dining table with the pizza.

Jim’s stepfather lingered in the kitchen for several moments pretending to make coffee as far as Spock could tell. It seemed more like he was trying to intimidate Jim with his mere presence. Jim only played with the slice of pizza he had taken though Spock knew he had to be hungry.

Spock found himself glaring at Frank instead of eating his pizza either.

“What’s with you two? Why aren’t you eating?” Frank demanded after several minutes of silence. “You’ve gotta be the weirdest teenagers anywhere.”

Spock saw Jim’s shoulders tense but still the younger teen made no response to his stepfather.

“Well, you’d better eat it,” Frank said then. “Every bite. It cost enough credits that’s for sure. I wasn’t going to get you anything but your mom insisted. She doesn’t know how ungrateful you can be.”

Jim visibly flinched and then seemed to hunch and make himself smaller.

Spock counted to five. It did no good.  “Perhaps if you were not staring at us as though we were a zoological exhibit, we would consume our meal.”

Jim gasped, his eyes wide.

“What did you say to me, you little freak?”

Now Jim turned around and faced his stepfather. “Frank!”

Frank looked furious. “Well.”

“You don’t want me to tell Mom you’re bothering our guest, do you, Frank?” Jim asked in a low voice. His gaze was surprisingly steady as he stared at his stepfather.

Frank narrowed his eyes at Jim, but then finally stepped away from his fidgeting with the coffeemaker. “I’m going upstairs. Tell your mother that’s where I am if she asks.”

Jim turned back around to his plate with his slice of pizza on it while Frank stomped up the stairs. “Sorry about that. He has no right to call you names. He’s an asshole.”

Spock shook his head. “It is no matter. I have been called such names before. One becomes used to it.”

“Who has called you names?”

“There are those on Vulcan who do not welcome either me or my mother,” Spock said simply. He did not want to dredge up old memories that were best forgotten. “Will you eat now that he has gone?”

“You shouldn’t have to be used to it,” Jim muttered, picking up the slice.

“Nor should you have to be used to what happens to you,” he said quietly.

Jim looked away then, but he took a bite of the pizza.

By the time they had finished, eating mostly in silence, Jim had eaten five slices to Spock’s three. He had an urge to ask Jim to eat the final two slices, since his boyfriend was still far too thin, but he didn’t know how to do so without upsetting Jim. Spock never wanted to do that.

They cleaned up the kitchen together after and Jim’s mother still had not come out from the room she’d gone into. Jim turned off the coffeemaker and left on just a light for her before he and Spock went upstairs.

Once inside the bedroom, Jim leaned against the door, looking very shy. “Did you want to meditate? I can go make myself scarce.”

“I would like to but you do not have to leave,” Spock assured him. “I only require quiet. I will wait until you have retired to bed.”

Jim licked his lips, then straightened away from the door, heading for his dresser.

Spock went over to the door and locked it as was his habit.

He tried, not very successfully, to avoid watching Jim change out of his clothes and into his pajamas. Though Jim was far too thin, he was still very attractive in Spock’s estimation. And now since they had established by their becoming boyfriends they were mutually attracted to each other, Spock found it even more difficult to look away and allow Jim privacy.

Just as Jim pulled on his T-shirt over his head, he turned and caught Spock watching him. He blinked several times and Spock knew his own cheeks must have darkened with shame.

“Are you watching me?” Jim asked.

“Yes,” Spock admitted. “I-you are very pleasing.”

Jim smiled. “Yeah?”

It surprised Spock that Jim did not know, but then perhaps it did not. He wondered if anyone in Jim’s life had ever told him of his value.

“Yes, ashaya.”

“What is that word?”

“It is a Vulcan word. Perhaps it is most closely translated to sweetheart or love. There is also ashayam. They are similar endearments.” Spock shifted, feeling awkward. “I hope they are all right.”

“Are you kidding?” Jim’s smile widened. “I love them.”

Spock nodded, finding himself looking away shyly this time.

Jim seemed to sense his embarrassment because he then went over to the bed and got in, pulling just the sheet around him, ignoring the blanket which he left as the foot of the bed.

Spock changed into his sleeping robe and then proceeded to sit on his mat for meditation. His mind was too disordered, however, and he was unable to achieve full meditation. He gave up after fifteen minutes and joined Jim in bed.

Jim seemed to have already fallen asleep but when Spock got in next to him, he turned toward Spock and flung his arm around Spock’s waist. His face sort of squished into Spock’s neck. For about thirty seconds, Spock considered extracting himself from Jim’s hold. And then it occurred to him that he really did not mind. Nor did he need the blanket with Jim there. He relaxed into Jim’s snuggle and allowed his own eyes to drift closed.               


	13. Take the World in a Love Embrace Fire All of Your Guns at Once And Explode into Space

“Where’s Mom?”

Jim hovered nervously on the edge of the kitchen, twisting the hem of his T-shirt in his hands.

Frank’s back was to him as he stirred sugar into his coffee. “Left on a shuttle early this morning.”

“Left?”

“For San Francisco.”

“I thought she was staying for the summer.”

Frank turned around to face Jim, his expression openly hostile. “She went to meet her lover. But she’ll be back in a few days.”

“Her-her what?”

“Bitch doesn’t think I know. She’s as fucking stupid as you are.” Frank flicked his head toward the back door. “Get out there and help me with the truck.”

Jim wrapped his arms around himself, his heartbeats increasing speed. “I was going to have breakfast.”

“Breakfast can wait, you little snot. You need to earn food around here. Now get your scrawny ass outside before I give you what for.”

Jim turned away, biting his lip, but he went into the living room where he’d left a pair of sneakers and put them on. Then he went outside to the barn where the truck was. Only a minute later, Frank came out.

“Where’s the Vulcan?”

“Still asleep.”

Frank spit. “Later, I’m going to make some inquiries.”

“Inquiries?”

“About getting him sent home. I was doing this for your mother’s career, but seeing how she’s fucking her captain, I don’t think I need to worry about that. And I sure as hell don’t want the freak here.”

“But-but I like him.”

Frank laughed. “You? What you like don’t mean shit. And anyway, I don’t trust you two together.”

Jim frowned. “Trust us to do what?”

“You two little faggots are not gonna screw around in my home.”

“This isn’t your home, it’s Mom’s.”

“What you say to me, you piece of shit?” Frank pushed him. “This _is_ my home. If anyone doesn’t belong here, it’s you, you little shithead. As soon as that Vulcan is gone, I’m gonna fuck you up bad. So bad you’ll wish you were back starving on Tarsus.”

Rage filled Jim up so suddenly his whole body shook as he clenched his fists. “Fuck you.”

“What you say?” Frank grabbed a wrench.

“I said…fuck you.”

Frank rushed at him, slamming him against the wall of the barn so hard that tools fell off the wall all around him. Jim’s head cracked against the wood.

“You think you can talk back to me?” Frank grabbed him around the throat, squeezing. “I don’t give a damn about you. You can fucking die right now!”

Jim gasped as Frank’s fingers tightened around him. His throat hurt, his lungs began to burn, spots appeared before his vision as he desperately clawed at his stepfather. This was it. He was going to die. After everything he’d been through, everything he’d survived. He reached blindly next to him for anything to use to try to free himself. But he was weakening fast.

His fingers closed around the handle of a hammer. He pulled it off the wall and swung it at Frank as best he could, it connected with his hand, not that hard, but it was enough that Frank let go and Jim slipped to the ground.

“You piece of shit, I’ll kill you!” Frank yelled, holding his hand.

Jim scrambled to get away, his lungs desperately trying to suck in air. Frank kicked him hard in the stomach sending him right back to the floor of the barn, moaning in agony. He tried to crawl away but Frank was reaching toward him, intent on pulling him up off the ground.

Jim heard a noise, turned to look behind him to see what Frank was doing next and watched as Frank fell to the ground beside him, almost on top of him. Jim moved away as quickly as he could, eyes wide.

“Are you all right, Jim?” Spock asked, his dark eyes almost wild as he reached down to help Jim to his feet.

Jim swayed and leaned into Spock, who pulled him close. He nodded, not sure his voice even worked just then.

Spock pulled away but only far enough to gently touch the already forming bruises on Jim’s throat. Then his other hand went to where Jim was kicked, lifting up his shirt to survey the damage Frank had done.

“What- what did you do?” Jim asked, his voice hoarse, raspy.

“I rendered him unconscious with the Vulcan nerve pinch.” Spock helped Jim over to a nearby bench. “Sit here a moment, Jim.” Spock then went deeper into the barn.

Jim watched a little dazed as Spock reappeared with heavy rope. He blinked rapidly as Spock hog-tied Frank, there was simply no other word for it.

“We-we have to get out of here,” Jim whispered.

“I had the same thought, thus the ropes. I cannot allow him to pursue us.” Spock crouched down next to Jim. “Where will we go, ashaya?”

Jim bit his lip. “Um. San Francisco? To see my mother?”

“Then you will finally tell her?”

He nodded. “If she believes me.”

“She will.”

"What about your parents?" Jim asked.

"We will contact them on the road when we are far away from here." Spock took Jim’s hand. “I will let no one else hurt you again.” Spock straightened and looked at Frank laying tied on the ground, still unconscious. “We will take your bike. And as many credits as we can." He bent down to Frank and rested his fingers on Jim’s stepfather’s face. “Forget.”

Jim stood up. “What was that?”

“As I said, I do not want him pursuing us.” Spock took Jim’s arm. “Let’s go.”


	14. Cherish is the Word I Use to Describe All the Feelings That I Have Hiding Here for You Inside

Spock walked back from the motel lobby to the car where he’d left a sleeping Jim. They had made the decision on taking one of Thatcher’s classic cars rather than Jim’s motorbike because they could carry more in the vehicle and it would be more comfortable when the need for rest came.

Spock had driven the entire way to their current destination. Jim was very quiet and withdrawn until he finally drifted off to sleep. Spock checked on him perhaps a little obsessively to make sure that his injuries were not more serious than he’d first believed.

“Jim?” He gently shook the boy. “We have arrived at a motel.”

Jim blinked his eyes open and stared at Spock with no little confusion. “What?”

“I have stopped for the night. Once I settle you in our room, I will obtain food.”

“Where are we?”

“I believe the name is Desolation.”

Jim’s eyes widened. “Really?”

Spock’s lips twitched. “No, but it is close.”

Jim got out of the car, stumbling a little.

“Are you all right?” Spock asked, grabbing him instantly.

“Yeah. Just a little stiff from the car ride.” Jim licked his lips. “And maybe from the fight with Frank.”

“I will look at your injuries inside.”

“They rented you a room? I didn’t think they would to minors.”

“The desk clerk was assured that due to the extended lifespan of Vulcans, we age differently than humans, and therefore look younger than one might think.”

“You lied?”

“I implied.” Spock opened the trunk and took out the bags they had packed. He walked over to room seven and punched in the code the clerk had given him.

He allowed Jim inside first and then closed and locked the door. There was only one bed in the room and Spock wasn’t sure if he should have requested two, but the truth was he had no desire to sleep in a separate bed from Jim.

“Is this satisfactory?” he asked.

“Sure.” Jim sat on the edge of the bed and bounced on it a little.

Spock set their bags down and then turned to Jim. “Remove your shirt.”

Jim pulled it off over his head and left it next to him on the bed. He was bruised all over, but nothing looked serious. He even had bruises around his neck.

“Does it hurt, ashaya?”

“Some,” Jim admitted. “Thank you, by the way. For-for stopping him.”

“I could not let him continue to hurt you.”

Jim averted his gaze. “I think he intended to kill me this time.”

“It did appear so.” Spock knelt in front of Jim. “I wish that I could have prevented him harming you at all.”

“I’m sorry I got you into all this. I hope you won’t get in trouble because of me.”

“It will not be because of you, Jim.” He put his hand on Jim’s knee. “Are you hungry?”

“Yeah. But it’s okay if we don’t have anything.”

“It is not. There is a twenty-four hour diner attached to this establishment.”

Jim nodded. “Okay. But-but I’d rather just be with you than anyone else.”

“I will pick up food and bring it back here to eat. The man in the lobby advised there is a menu in the room.” Spock stood and turned to a desk in the room where he found the menu. “If you would like, you may shower while I get food.”

“All right.” Jim got up and went to look at the menu with Spock. “What can I get?”

“You can get anything you want, Ashaya. I have the credits.”

Jim bit his lip. “Do they have mashed potatoes?”

“They do. As well as something called meatloaf that comes with them. We could order that for you and perhaps an extra side of mashed potatoes?”

Jim smiled. “That sounds great. Thank you.”

“You are quite welcome. I will be back soon.” He touched his fingers to Jim’s and then went to obtain food for them.

****

When Spock returned Jim was still in the shower. He set the food containers down on the desk and then went to the bathroom door.

“Jim? Your dinner is here.”

“O-okay.”

Spock froze. He heard the unmistakable hint of tears in Jim’s voice. Perhaps he should leave Jim alone, but it was not possible for him to do so. He twisted the handle of the bathroom door and was relieved when it gave and opened.

“Jim?”

Jim was still in the shower behind the shower curtain but he gave a little sucked in gasp.

Spock pulled back the curtain and sure enough a very red and wet Jim had tears leaking from his eyes. Spock leaned past him and turned off the shower. Then before Jim could protest, he reached in, wrapped his arms around Jim’s middle, lifted him over the lip of the tub and out onto the floor of the bathroom and in Spock’s arms.

“I’m-I’m all wet.”

“A little water is a small matter,” Spock whispered against the top of Jim’s head. “You are experiencing significant distress.”

“I’m so tired of hurting.”

Spock closed his eyes, his throat nearly closing up with emotion so strong he had no idea how to handle it. “I will let no one hurt you again.”

“Why-why are you even helping me? You only just met me.”

“You are my—”

“Boyfriend?”

Spock let out a heavy breath. “More than that. Someday it will all make sense and we will discover it all together. We are sort of betrothed by Vulcan standards.”

Jim hiccupped. “Betrothed?”

“The point is I will not allow anyone to hurt you. I would fight Gorns for you.”

He heard a little laugh and was relieved by it.

“Well, if you’d fight Gorns, you must really like me.”

Spock pulled back to frame Jim’s face with his hands. “I cherish you.”

Jim’s eyes softened into pools of liquid blue. Spock found himself enchanted. “I’ve never been cherished by anyone.”

“If there is no one else, you will always have me,” Spock promised. “You should get dressed. Your dinner is waiting. There are lots of mashed potatoes and they are covered in what I have been told is the best beef gravy on Earth.”

Jim smiled. “That sounds good. What did you get?”

“A vegetable quiche with a brioche bun.”

“Mine sounds better.”

Spock leaned forward to kiss him and then released his hold. “Dress. And come out. Do you want tea? I got iced tea for both of us.”

Jim nodded. “Okay. I’ll be right out.”

Spock turned.

“Hey Spock?”

“Yes, Jim?”

“I, uh, I really like you, too. A lot. Um, okay?” Jim was blushing and Spock found it illogically appealing.

“Okay.”

Jim smiled and closed the bathroom door.


	15. Baby if You Hold Me Then All of This Will Go Away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title of this chapter comes from George Ezra's song Budapest. A very catchy song indeed. And rather fitting for our lovely star-crossed boys

“Spock?”

“Yes?”

“You awake?” Jim felt Spock shift in the bed to face him. In the dark Spock’s fingers found Jim’s. He smiled in the darkness.

“I would not have responded had I been asleep,” Spock said softly.

Jim closed his eyes and his smile widened. Which was probably weird. Not the smiling part. Spock made him smile. But the part where he closed his eyes. It was dark. He couldn’t really see much anyway. And it wasn’t like he was ready to go to sleep.

“Do you…I don’t know.”

“Jim, if there is something on your mind, please tell me.”

Now that he started it, Jim wasn’t sure what to say or if he should even bring it up. It helped that it was dark. He could only imagine how much he’d blush if Spock could actually see him.

“Do you think we’ll get in trouble?” Jim asked. Which was not at all what he wanted to talk about, but it was the easier topic to bring up.

“I do not know,” Spock admitted. “I intend to contact my mother tomorrow to make her aware of our whereabouts.”

Jim bit his lip. “Is that wise?”

“I do not wish for her to worry and anyway since our plan is to reach your mother in San Francisco, they will all know soon anyway.”

“Yeah.”

“If your concern is that you will be returned to your stepfather, I assure you that will not occur.”

Jim shook his head, the pillow swallowing most of the movement. “How can you be so sure?”

“I will not allow it.”

Jim scoffed at that. “Adults don’t listen to kids, Spock. And you may be older than me, but you’re still a kid.”

“You are my t’hy’la. I will prevent it.”

“What is that? Your…ta-hyl—”

“T’hy’la.”

“Yeah, okay. What is it?”

“It is difficult to explain in Earth terms,” Spock said quietly. “I suppose the closest equivalent in your terms is a soulmate.”

“A soulmate?” Jim’s breath caught on a laugh. “You think _I’m_ your soulmate?”

Spock stiffened beside him. “Is the concept so unappealing?”

“Unappealing?” Jim asked, incredulous. “No. Spock, you could have _anyone_. I’m nothing but a weakling, skinny dork with bad skin. What would you see in me?”

Spock suddenly rose up and hovered over Jim in the bed, his hands cradling Jim’s face and his weight on Jim making it a lot harder to breath than a moment ago.

“You are beautiful to me. I have never known anyone like you. And that we share such a connection is precious.”

And the feel of Spock on him, touching him in this intimate way, brought the subject Jim had really wanted to broach back to the forefront of his mind.

Jim moistened his lips. “Do you-do you think we should do something?”

God how were you even supposed to ask something like that without sounding lame?

Spock stared down at him. “Do something?”

“Yeah. Um. You know. Um. Sex-sexually.”

Spock did not respond but he did shift slightly on Jim.

“We don’t have to or anything,” Jim said quickly. “I just…well I never have. I’ve never really wanted to. Before you. And I know maybe I’m too young for you to want to. But if you did—”

“Jim.” Spock silenced him and then leaned down to softly kiss Jim’s chapped lips. It was over all too quickly. “There is no rush to complete our coupling.”

“Coupling?” Jim sucked in a breath. “Does that mean you don’t want to?”

Spock shook his head. “I desire to be with you in every way that we can be, ashayam. But you have recently escaped a traumatic situation where you received injuries and we are in a strange place. I would desire our first time to be comfortable and intimate for both of us.”

Jim smiled and swallowed heavily. “So it’s not that you don’t want me?”

Spock’s hands on Jim’s face gentled. “Never. Until we take our last breaths as one, I will want you.”

Jim nodded. Or tried to with Spock’s hands on his face. “Okay. I feel the same by the way.”

“I know.”

Jim squirmed a little and Spock moved so that he was beside Jim instead of on him. “Is that the telepathic thing?”

“Yes,” Spock admitted. “I feel your emotions through skin contact. I am aware you harbor affection for me and I am gratified.”

Jim laughed softly. “Okay, but it’s a little weird.”

“I return your affection tenfold,” Spock assured him. He laid on his back and then reached for Jim, pulling him on top.

“Won’t I be too heavy for you like this?” Jim asked, even though he wanted to stay like that on Spock. He had to at least ask.

“Negative. Your weight is negligible. It is a comfort to me like this.” Spock scooted Jim’s shirt up to expose bare skin and then his hands smoothed over it. “Skin contact is preferable.”

Jim smiled. “It’s preferable to me too.”

“Go to sleep, my Jim. We have a full day of traveling tomorrow.”

Jim yawned. “All right. Goodnight, Spock.”

“Goodnight, t’hy’la.”


	16. Contacting Mother

Spock knew he should probably wake Jim, but he looked so at peace while sleeping, so wrapped up in innocence, that he did not have the heart to do so. If they left a little later than he had originally intended, so be it. He doubted Jim felt safe enough to sleep so deeply most of the time and that he did with Spock gratified him.

He stepped out of their motel room to secure breakfast and to speak with his mother without disturbing the boy.

The most important thing was having his parents on board with what he intended. He took his PADD into the general room of the motel office where he was told the best reception for contacting someone on Vulcan would be. After a few moments, his mother appeared.

“Oh, Spock, it’s early there, isn’t it?”

“Yes, Mother. But I have completed sleeping for now.”

Mother smiled. “Where are you? That place looks different.”

Spock nodded. “I am at a motel.”

Her smile slipped. “I don’t understand. Why are you at such a place?”

“I am here with Jim. It was necessary for us to leave Riverside.”

“Spock. You ran away?”

“Affirmative. Mother—”

“You can’t just run away. The people looking after you will worry.”

“They are why we ran away, Mother. Jim’s mother is in San Francisco. Soon she will return to her assignment in space under Captain Pike. That is why she is currently there, making preparations though she does not leave for another month. We thought it best to make our way there.”

“What aren’t you telling me, Spock?”

“Mother, Jim is being abused by his stepfather.”

“Abused?”

“Yes, physically, verbally, and mentally.” Spock hesitated. Then he told her about Jim’s time on Tarsus IV and Frank’s cruelty about food even now with Jim. And all the bruises and injuries he saw that Jim had tried to hide or downplay.

“Oh, that poor child,” Mother said. Her eyes had turned very sad.

“I myself witnessed Frank Thatcher become so violent with Jim that I anticipated his intent was to do irreparable harm. I could not allow Jim to continue to live there under those circumstances.”

“Of course you couldn’t.”

“I disabled Mr. Thatcher so that he could not pursue us. And now we are here. As soon as Jim awakens and has breakfast, we will once more be on the road to San Francisco.”

“Yes.” Mother nodded. "That's good."

“Mother?”

"Yes, Spock?"

“Jim is very special.”

Her smile returned. “Oh? You quite like him then?”

“It is more than that,” Spock admitted. “Jim is…I believe he is my…t’hy’la.”

Mother’s eyes widened. “Oh.”

Spock lowered his gaze and then let it rise again to meet her eyes. “I wish for him to live with us on Vulcan. His mother will be off planet and I will not allow my t’hy’la to stay with his stepfather. I cannot.”

“Of course you can’t,” Mother agreed. “Go to San Francisco. Your father and I will come there also. We must speak to Jim’s mother and her commanding officer. I will have Sarek contact them at once.”

“Yes, Mother.”

“And in the meantime, don’t let anyone take Jim.”

“I would not.”

She smiled. “You love him, don’t you?”

“Mother, love is—”

“An emotion. Yes, I know.”

Spock arched a brow. “I was going to say it was not a strong enough word to encompass my feelings toward Jim. And speaking of, I must obtain his breakfast. He will be very hungry.”

“Keep in touch. And we will see you in San Francisco.”

Spock went to the little restaurant where he had obtained dinner the night before and ordered a large breakfast of eggs, bacon, potatoes, and biscuits and gravy for Jim. He also obtained tea for both of them, and then he made his way back to their motel room.

Spock was pleased to see Jim was still sleeping, so he carefully set down the breakfast boxes on the table in the room and went to the bed to sit beside his sleeping t’hy’la.

He touched his fingers to Jim’s forehead and the lines there smoothed out. In only a minute, his eyes blinked open.

“Is it morning?” Jim asked, his voice rough with sleep.

“Yes. I brought you breakfast.”

“You didn’t have to do that.” But he was smiling.

Spock refrained from saying that he did, because of course, he did, and would take care of all of Jim’s needs. He must protect and care for his young t’hy’la.

“Wait here, I will bring it to you.”

Jim bit his lip and nodded and sat up in the bed. He watched as Spock picked up the container and brought it to him with a fork, knife and spoon.

“It smells great,” Jim said, sounding a little in awe.

Spock swallowed the lump in his throat at seeing Jim so happy for the food. Hate was not an emotion he indulged in and yet, he hated Frank Thatcher.

“I have contacted my mother and she and my father will meet us in San Francisco,” Spock told Jim as he watched Jim eat.

“Yeah?” Jim asked around a mouthful of potatoes. “How come?”

“I had to inform her we ran away, of course, and once we speak to your mother, it is my intention to have you come to Vulcan to live with us.”

Jim’s mouth opened and he lowered his fork. “Vulcan?"

“Indeed.”

“But…are you sure?”

“Why would I not be?” Spock asked, genuinely puzzled.

Jim visibly swallowed, then licked his lips. He dropped his gaze. “You’d really want that? Me to live with you?”

“Yes.”

“But nobody ever-ever—” Jim’s bottom lip was quivering.

“Jim?” Spock was growing alarmed.

“No one ever wants me,” he whispered.

“I do.”

Jim looked at him. There was so much hope and love in those blue eyes that Spock caught his breath. “You really want me to go to Vulcan with you?”

“It is my greatest wish, ashaya.”

A beautiful smile appeared on Jim’s face. “That would be incredible.”

Spock let himself feel relief. “Then you wish to?”

“Of course I do.” Jim hesitated. “Will they let me?”

“I believe they will.”

“You-you don’t think we’ll get in trouble for Frank, will we?”

“I do not. I believe he is the one who will face consequences, Jim.” Spock placed his hand on Jim’s knees. “Please eat. When you have finished we will prepare to make our departure.”

Jim nodded, smiling. “This is really good.” He held out a spoonful of potatoes toward Spock, who, of course, tasted them, 


	17. Three Options

“James Kirk?”

Jim stiffened even as he felt Spock’s hand on his back. The man in front of him wore a uniform. Starfleet. But he didn’t really know enough to tell what rank the man was. But Jim thought he was security. It was on the tip of his tongue to deny who he was and he took a step back moving closer to Spock.

“Spock?” the man asked Spock, looking past Jim.

“Yes. We are James and Spock,” Spock answered for them.

“Come with me.”

“To where?”

Jim scooted behind Spock. He couldn’t help it. The man’s cool stare was making him uncomfortable. Spock exchanged a quick glance with Jim, then full blocked Jim from the man.

The guard’s face softened marginally. “Just to a waiting room, boys. Your parents are discussing your welfare right now and want you to wait for them.”

“Parents?” Jim asked, nervously.

“What is the name of those involved?”

“Ambassador Sarek and his wife, Amanda. And Commander Winona Kirk and Captain Christopher Pike, her commanding officer,” the guard replied, clearly amused by their trepidation.

“Frank Thatcher is not among them?” Spock asked for clarification purposes which Jim definitely appreciated. If Frank was there, Jim would bolt and Spock surely knew it.

“No. This way, boys.”

They followed him then, down a long hallway that seemed to go on forever. Jim clung to Spock’s arm, though he guessed he wasn’t supposed to. He’d read enough about Vulcan customs to know he shouldn’t and yet he couldn’t make himself let go.

At some point, Jim hoped he would become braver than he was. He was embarrassed to be so afraid.

“Here we are,” the guard said, his whole demeanor much kinder than it had initially been.

He’d stopped at a very large waiting room with several plush chairs and couches. Spock pulled him toward a brown, soft looking couch and they sat down together.

“I’ll be right back,” the Starfleet guy said.

“I’m sorry,” Jim said the minute he was out of earshot.

“For what, ashaya?”

“I know I’m being needy. I know I need to—”

“Jim,” Spock said softly. The command in his voice had Jim instantly shutting up. “You are the bravest boy I have ever known. You owe no explanation and certainly no apology.”

Jim smiled. Or he tried to. He was just so nervous. What if his mom didn’t believe him? What if she did and sent him some place like Tarsus again? Or took him with her so he wouldn’t see Spock again? He wondered if it was possible for him and Spock to be on the run from them, from all of them, for years so that they could not be separated. But that wouldn’t be fair to Spock, because his parents cared about him.

“We will not be separated, Jim.”

He bit his lip. “How can you be sure?”

“I will not allow it.”

The Starfleet guard reappeared holding a huge tray. He placed it on the table in front of the couch. There was a pitcher of water and glasses, a pot of tea and cups, little savory meat pies and vegetable pies and scrumptious looking cookies.

He smiled at them. “You may be here a while. I figured you might be hungry.”

Jim blinked. “Thanks.”

“No problem.” His gaze swept over them. “Stay put until they call you.”

And then he left them alone again.

“Tea?” Spock offered.

“Yes, please.”

Spock poured Jim tea and then himself, before placing a meat pie and several cookies on a plate for Jim before taking some of the vegetable pies for himself.

They ate in silence, but Spock continued to lightly stroke Jim’s hand.

An hour had passed before a door not far from them opened and a tall man with slightly graying hair stepped out.

He came towards them and Jim and Spock stood.

“Hello, Jim, Spock. I’m Captain Christopher Pike.”

Jim swallowed. “Sir.”

“Captain Pike.”

“Jim, I’d like you to come with me.”

“I will accompany you,” Spock said immediately before Jim could voice his apprehension.

“It’s like that, is it?” Pike asked with amusement.

“Affirmative.”

They followed Pike into the room he had just emerged from. Jim saw that his mother was there as were Spock’s parents. There was also a strange man.

Spock’s mother immediately came to Spock and embraced him. Spock turned slightly green and pulled away with a muttered, “Mother.”

Jim’s own mother was more reserved but she did give him a slightly strained smile. “Hello, baby.”

“Jim, we’d like you to show us the injuries you received from Thatcher,” Pike said. “We have Dr. Morris here to take a look. You may need treatment.”

Jim looked to Spock who nodded encouragement. Jim sighed a little and then lifted his shirt off over his head to reveal the bruises on his torso and around his neck. He heard his mother gasp.

The strange man, Dr. Morris, approached him with a frown and a scanner which he ran over Jim.

“How long as this been going on, Jim?” Pike asked, in a very gentle voice.

“Since-since I got back from-from Tarsus IV. And, um, before that, before I went too.” He felt too much emotion welling up inside and he was very afraid he was about to cry. He looked helplessly toward Spock, who carefully stepped closer and held out his fingers to Jim. Jim touched them. Little by little he got himself under control and he knew that came from Spock.

“Most of his injuries are healing,” Morris said. “Bruises mostly, which I can’t do anything about those. But there’s evidence of prior breaks and some previous damage to his internal organs.” Morris touched Jim’s arm. “I’d like to give you some vitamin supplements and a couple of shots, if you’re willing.”

Jim nodded. “Okay.”

Pike thanked Morris, who moved off to his medical bag. “Sit down, Jim.”

Jim took the chair that Pike pointed to and he was grateful, absurdly so, when Spock moved to stand beside him.  

“We’ve been discussing your future, Jim,” Pike said. “It’s not the best solution to run away from home.”

Jim opened his mouth to protest.

Pike held up his hand. “Under the circumstances, however, no one blames you. You were in immediate danger.”

“I-I don’t want to go back there.”

“You won’t have to,” Jim’s mom spoke up. She moved around the couch and knelt in front of Jim, taking his hands. Her eyes welled with tears. “I’m so sorry, baby. I’ll make it up to you, I swear.”

Pike looked at Spock. “Thatcher’s memories have been returned and he doesn’t deny anything.”

“Bastard,” Jim’s mother muttered.

“He’s been arrested and charges will be pressed.”

“You’ll never have to deal with him again,” Winona said fiercely. She squeezed Jim’s hands. “I can resign my commission in Starfleet and take care of you.”

Alarm shot through Jim. He quickly looked to Spock, who was looking at him. “But I-I—”

“That’s an option,” Pike said quickly, carefully. “Another is that we can take you with us on board my ship where your mother will be serving. It’s not ideal and normally children are not allowed, but I think the case can be made to make an exception.”

“Please, I…” Jim clutched at Spock.

“We are aware of your status with Spock,” Pike said. “We don’t wish to interfere with that.”

Ambassador Sarek cleared his throat and stepped forward. “Then you are aware, Captain, that during this particular time in Jim’s development both as a young human male and with the bond he shares with my own son, also developing and strengthening, it would be ill-advised to separate them for any length of time.”

“And yes, that’s the other option,” Pike acknowledged, squeezing Jim’s mom’s shoulder and helping her to her feet. “Ambassador Sarek and his wife, Amanda Grayson, have put forward the request on behalf of themselves and their son, Spock, that you be allowed to live with them on Vulcan for the remainder of your minority.”

Pike smiled at Winona. “Under full disclosure, Jim, your mother and I are involved and prior to the discovery of the abuse you suffered under, divorce proceedings had been discussed.”

“Do I get a choice?” Jim asked.

“Yes,” his mother answered. “Although I think I know what you will choose.”

He nodded, swallowed hard. “I want to go with Spock.”

She closed her eyes briefly, but then she opened them and gave him a sad little smile. “Considering my own failings, I can hardly blame you. Nor will I stand in the way of your choice. I can do that much. Jim, can I speak to you a moment in private? Please?”

He figured he had to agree, so he stood and walked with her, following her out into the corridor. It was then she hugged him for the first time since he arrived there. With some reluctance, Jim hugged her back.

When she pulled away to look at him, her eyes were wet. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

“Well.” Jim licked his lips. “I-I didn’t think you’d believe me.”

“Oh, Jim.” She touched his cheek. “Maybe I wouldn’t have. God, I’m so stupid. I’m the worst mother.”

“No,” Jim denied.

She kissed his forehead. “I can’t believe you’re going to Vulcan.”

He released a breath. “Me either.”

“If they’re mean to you, you’ll let me know?”

“Yes.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

****

Jim leaned against Spock as the shuttle left Earth for Vulcan. He was holding Spock’s hand, too, though he was trying to do it discreetly.

“I am pleased you will be staying with us, ashayam.”

“But in a separate bedroom,” Jim said with a little pout.

“There will be plenty of time for sexual congress in the future,” Spock replied, with no little amusement.

Jim choked on a laugh. “Did you just say—Oh my God. You totally did.”

Spock glanced around the shuttle and then put his hand on Jim’s head, letting Jim feel his affection. “Taluhk nash-veh k'dular, kanbu.”

“Will I like Vulcan?”

“I do not know.”

“I will,” Jim said with a smile. “Because you’ll be there.”

“Indeed.”

“It’s like I’ll be the exchange student now.”

“Perhaps. But I refuse to exchange you back. Sleep, Jim. When you wake we’ll be there.”

Jim closed his eyes. “Home.”

“Yes,” Spock whispered. “Home.”


	18. Epilogue

Jim stepped onto the shuttle ramp with no little excitement. His whole body thrummed with it. If his steps were a little more bouncy than normal, who could blame him? He slung his bag over his shoulder and tried not to run. That would be undignified and illogical.

As soon as he reached the bottom, Jim looked around, anxious.

“Jim!”

He broke out into a grin as he rushed over to Christopher Pike. “Hi, Chris.”

Pike hugged him. “You look very happy.”

“I am,” Jim exclaimed. “I can’t believe I’m here. And in two weeks I start Starfleet Academy. I don’t know if I can stand to wait.”

Pike laughed. “You’ll manage.”

“I didn’t know you were coming to meet me.”

“I wasn’t. I just happened to be here on other business and learned from your mom today was the day. Thought I’d stop by to see you.” Pike smiled warmly. “Don’t worry. He’s here.”

“I-I wasn’t worried,” Jim said, flushing.

“Sure you weren’t.”

“It’s just it’s been a year since he left and—”

“See you around, Jim.”    

He turned to see who had patted him on the shoulder and saw it was Leonard McCoy who he had met on the shuttle to San Francisco.

Jim waved. “You too.”

“New friend?” Pike asked.

“I think so, yeah. I hope so anyway.”

“I won’t keep you. Your mother and I expect you two to come by for dinner though later this week.”

Jim grinned. “We’ll be there, sir.”

Pike patted his back. He inclined his head to the right. “Over there.”

Jim looked over and his breath caught in is throat.

Spock stood there, wearing a red Starfleet uniform. He’d come the prior year as he was ahead of Jim. And Jim knew Spock was speeding through his courses. There was even talk of him getting a professorship at some point. All Jim knew was he missed Spock like fucking crazy.

He walked slowly over to where his husband and bondmate stood, his eyes shining as their gazes met. 

“You have no idea how much I missed you,” Jim whispered, standing entirely too close, but at least he wasn’t touching. Not yet.

“I have a pretty good idea,” Spock returned. He lifted Jim’s bag off his shoulder and onto his own. “I have a hover car waiting.”

Jim licked his lips. “After you.”

He followed after Spock, trying to contain himself. He’d had to learn restraint. Being on Vulcan had ensured that. But God, he couldn’t wait to touch Spock.

“The trip to my apartment is not far,” Spock assured him as he opened to door for Jim, then went to the driver side. When he belted himself in next to Jim. “You are anxious.”

“A little.”

Spock rested his hand on Jim’s leg and squeezed gently.

It was not enough. But it was better than nothing.

Jim tried not to be antsy as the hover car made the brief trip to where Spock lived. And where Jim would live, too, now.

“There is a market just two doors down,” Spock explained. “If there is anything specific you require, we can stop there before going to the apartment.”

“No, there’s nothing.”

“Jim.”

“Okay maybe later. Right now, I can’t think about the store.” Jim bit his lip. “Please.”

His mind was flooded with warmth and assurance. And a touch of amusement.    

It was all Jim could do not to maul Spock in the elevator up to the third floor apartment. He reminded himself that he was practicing restraint.

Spock scanned his hand over the entrance to the apartment. “Your hand will also open the door,” Spock said as the door slid open.

“Uh-huh. Sure. Got it.”

Spock arched a brow at him but gestured for Jim to proceed him inside.

As soon as the door closed and Spock set Jim’s bag down, Jim threw himself at his husband. His hands slid up the inside of Spock’s shirt until he had direct skin contact. But that was not enough, still.

Jim pulled back enough to pull his own shirt off and then Spock’s and then once more threw himself into Spock’s arms.

“Oh, God. At last.”

Spock’s arms locked around him, pulling him closer still. “I too find our reunion pleasing.”

“Pleasing?” Jim laughed. “I’ve been going crazy. It’s been so long since I touched you. It was agony.”

“Perhaps a slight exaggeration.”

“No.”

“Meditation—”

“Oh, honey, you know I can’t meditate. Sitting still for all that time? Me?” Jim kissed Spock all over his face.

“Jim—”

“I know, I know. We’re alone now though. So it’s all right.” Jim pulled back just enough to look into Spock’s dark eyes. “Isn’t it?”

“It is all right,” Spock whispered. He closed his eyes and kissed Jim softly. “Do you wish to see the rest of the apartment?”

“Later.” Jim sighed and held Spock tighter. “I never realized how touch starved I was until you left me.”

“I did not leave you, I came to San Francisco to attend the Starfleet Academy.”

“Same thing,” Jim grumbled.

Spock kissed along Jim’s jaw. “I missed you too, adun.”

“Yeah?” Jim smiled brightly.

“Do you wish to see your home now? Your home for the foreseeable future anyway.”

“Spock,” Jim whispered, burying himself in all that was his Vulcan. “You are my home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading.

**Author's Note:**

> I've downgraded the rating to Teen and Up as there is no explicit sexual content in this one. All other warnings apply including references to child abuse and verbal abuse.


End file.
